6.12.21 - Joy status: Friends to help us move

We are almost done loading the truck and we are almost ready to depart for Missouri and we wouldn't have been as ready as we are now if it wasn't for a whole lot of help from our dear friends. People have helped pack over the last week or two, and then today load the truck itself, grab food and water for everyone, keep the kids busy, pack (tons of) last minute things, dismantle and move heavy furniture, make donation runs, scrub walls, and basically anything else I could think of to ask. Thank you, thank you! We have so many good friends.

5.5.21 - Kid snippets: Jane and Sarah are introverts together

This one is actually from January, but I don't want to forget it. I didn't witness this; Sarah relayed it to me.

We hosted a hot chocolate potluck and had half a dozen guests. Three-year-old Jane (an introvert) approached Sarah (also an introvert).

Jane: Do you want to sit on the couch with me?
Sarah: Sure.
They sit. (The couch is across the room from where most people were hanging out.)
Jane: There are a lot of people in my house.
Sarah: Yeah there are.
They sit a moment.
Jane: Do you want to do a puzzle with me?
Sarah: Sure!
Then they did a puzzle together away from the crowd.

1.8.21 - Joy status: I love my commute

It's amazing to me how what was once one of the worst parts of my week--my ridiculous 80 mile commute to and from work--has become one of the best parts thanks mostly* to technology. I've come to really enjoy the time to myself as I either "read" audiobooks of interest or catch up with friends (live or through video messaging).

The child-free time of my commute has directly resulted in more substantial connections to some of my closest friends. I have a pretty great weekly and monthly rotation of "commute contacts." I think I would enjoy this in any case, but the added socialization has been especially helpful in the last year when in-person interactions are more difficult.

*I say "mostly" because another factor was my schedule change--I now commute only at times when there isn't any horrendous traffic, so that makes it a lot more peaceful.

12.13.20 - At-home Polar Express

 Yesterday the Jackson cousins were going to have a polar Express party at Donna Marlene's. We were originally going to skip it. Then they asked us if we wanted to video chat with them live. I considered saying no because I didn't want my kids to see a party going on that they couldn't go to. But then I decided we could just have our own party and enjoy it with them long distance. 

So I brought home some large boxes from work, and yesterday the girls and I spent between four and five hours turning those boxes into our own miniature polar Express for them to sit in while watching the movie. in retrospect the process of making the train was probably as much if not more fun for them as the actual watch party. Clara in particular had a lot of input and was excited to add glue to construction paper. They both were excited to press the construction paper onto the box. I also sketched out the words "The polar Express" in fancy lettering and then Clara traced over it with a purple crayon. It was a long but pretty fun project and I was really happy with the result.

The train was done a few hours before the movie, and the kids got to play with it plenty. Clara put a cap on jingle Bear and have him sit in the engine and be the engineer. She also wrote hers and her siblings names on each of their respective train cars. 

We dressed the kids and ourselves in St Louis blues pajamas as an homage to last year's polar Express. We gave the kids bowls of zebra popcorn and Jack made them hot chocolate. We let the girls drink theirs out of the polar Express mugs with straws. Then we video chatted with the Jacksons for probably 10 or 15 minutes and it was pretty adorable. The cousins took turns showing each other their polar Express setups. Marlene had made a train of boxes also for because the cousins to sit in. The girls were excited to show our train and our little people Nativity set and our mugs. The cousins washed it all with appropriate interest and showed their treasures too. 

When it was time to watch the movie we turned off all the lights except for the Christmas lights. I gave the kids blankets to have in their respective train cars. Of course Calvin didn't last long before he tipped right out of his, and eventually Jane was too nervous with the creepy parts of the movie and wanted to sit with Jack and me on the couch. But Clara stayed in her caboose the entire time.

I think the best moment was right before the movie was starting and Clara could not contain her excitement. She kept saying she was so excited and stimming and even holding her breath a little bit. That alone might have made it worth it to me.

And as a bonus I even was able to write a lot of my Christmas cards while they were watching the movie. 

10.23.20 - Joy status: a long list

Joy Inventory:

TikTok put Calvin back to sleep.

• This morning Calvin woke up before everyone else and cuddled on the couch with me for a good 45 minutes--watching TikTok, lol.
• My long work commute gives me time I wouldn't otherwise have to stay in touch with a lot of people I care about.
• Last weekend I got to spend time with Neil and Ellen in person, and it was great. In fact I barely slept (relatively speaking) because I kept staying up late to talk.
• Sarah also got to join us for lots of the weekend. I love how long she's known my family (17 years now!) and how comfortable she is around all of us even though we are so yelly.
• Henry also joined and we played uninterrupted tichu and it was a really close game! 1005-1095 I think. I love close tichu games.
• I felt particularly useful at work yesterday. Good feeling.
• My office area faces a wall of floor-to-ceiling windows and this week when it was breezy leaves would flutter all around me.
• Clara and Jane play pretend together frequently, and I'm so grateful they have each other for company.
• Earlier this week we received some awesome kids Halloween books from Beth and several Halloween shirts, toys, and treats from my beloved in-laws.
• We're going to the pumpkin patch tomorrow with the one family with kids who has been spending time with us these last several months. Really glad we have them to join. Apparently they are also psyched about it.
• Next weekend we are going to "Erin's Halloween Candy Hunt," the event we've been counting down to in this house (literally, with a paper chain) since it was 45 days out. It's basically an easter egg hunt, but Halloween themed. It's going to be great, and it's entirely private so it cannot be cancelled unexpectedly.
• Jack often calorie counts the dinners he makes just for me, so I can better track what I'm eating. Such a sweet gesture.
• Our Director of Operations at work has decided to just...redo the office kitchen? And it's adorable. Lots of new colors and storage, backsplash, etc., feels halfway to a home kitchen. I really like it.
• A few of my friends who have left FB over the years have created a Discord channel for a group of us to keep in better touch, and it's been a great connection and outlet the last few weeks. So glad they thought of it.
• Last night when I pulled into my parking spot, Clara was standing in the nursery window and saw me. She started grinning hugely and as soon as I got out of the car she started shouting hello to me. Very sweet.
• Most nights when I get home from work, I walk in the front door and there is a moment when each of the kids realizes I got home and starts beaming. Calvin usually starts bouncing up and down on his butt reaching up for me to pick him up. Also very sweet.

5.11.19 - Jane's birthday party

Jane turns two on Monday, so we decided to celebrate today (the Saturday before) when we had time.

Despite us putting the girls to bed at about the same time Friday night as we do every night, they stayed up much later than usual. Jack went to get gluten free cake mix and frosting for me to bake Jane's cake the night before, and when he got back (near 9pm) they were both standing in the nursery window. I thought this was actually a good thing because maybe they would sleep in the next day, giving us time to clean up before having guests over and pushing Jane's nap back further. But no. They woke up even earlier than typical--about 6:30 am or so), and it made for a hectic morning. Also I'm reaching the third trimester and starting to feel the difficulty of getting up and down off the floor, which makes cleaning harder. But with Jack's help we still got everything clean and the girls ready pretty much on time.

A little light reading on the way to the zoo.

We met Henry at the zoo entrance and Clara was very happy about that. She said "Hello Henry elephant" so you know he's one of her people.

In retrospect we probably could have skipped the zoo. Most of the first set of cages were empty. The tiger cage was interesting because the tigers were very active, pacing back and forth right by the front. They have beautiful eyes. Clara and I watched from one end of the fence and Jack had Jane on his shoulder about 10-15 ft away from us. We watched for awhile and suddenly one of the tigers ran up to the cage and ROARED right at Jane. It made me jump pretty hard and it scared the heck out of Jane. Poor girl started crying really hard and I had to take her pretty far away and comfort her for awhile and hold her for awhile longer. After that she pretty much wanted to stay in the stroller for a long time. I felt really bad for her.

Clara, on the other hand, seemed to take the tiger in stride and enjoy the zoo. She was interested in the animals and even more interested in the cut outs where she could pretend to be animals, haha. Eventually we got to a farm animal section (horses, cows, bees, mules) and Jane was ready to get back out of the stroller and explore. The farm animal section's exit put us right in front of the nearby playground. Once you exit the zoo to the playground, you can't re-enter, so Jack and I considered backtracking to see parts of the zoo we had skipped. But the girls had already seen the playground and were making a beeline for it, and since this is about them--especially Jane--enjoying the day we decided just to go for it.

The playground has a Western theme, covered wagon, general store, etc. It's pretty cute.

It was a good choice. The Folsom playground is really cute and the section for especially little kids is well designed. Jack took Clara on the bigger kids section and Henry and I followed Jane around in the little kids area. She was very happy. Grinning and toddling quickly from one section to another. We stayed for awhile, and of course once we headed back Jane fell asleep in the car.

Henry drove separately and went to pick up In & Out for everyone for lunch. Sarah had taken the train up and was waiting at a nearby Starbucks for us, so she met us at the apartment complex once we were close. To our surprise, Jane didn't stay down for a nap when we got home--I thought she'd be exhausted but she was ready to be up and hang out. I was worried she would be super fussy the rest of the day from going to bed late, getting up early, and taking such a short nap, but actually she was in a great mood. We hadn't even started cake, presents, or balloons yet and she and Clara were having a great time pretending to be baby birds together. Plus Henry came back with lunch and the girls were delighted to eat fries.

Henry also left again to pick them up balloons. He got each of them a pink and gold bunch of about 6, and they loved them. They played with those for a long time before we moved on to cake.

When we did get cake and sing "Happy Birthday," it was interesting to see how different Jane's reaction was to Clara's at her own 2nd birthday. Clara had been pretty shy and held on to me while everyone sang, whereas Jane just grinned and grinned at us. To be fair, though, at Clara's 2nd birthday there had been a lot more people. Anyway we told Jane to blow out the candles and, from about 2 feet away, she did a quick burst of air that had no effect, haha. So I blew them out for her, and then we took off the girls shirts to let them eat cake, which they got everywhere. When they were done Jane had cake all over not only her face and hands but also her stomach and shins.

We cleaned them up and it was time to open presents. Jane is not that bad at ripping off wrapping paper once you get it started for her. She wanted to stop and examine/play with each new gift before opening the next, which was sweet. It was a little difficult for Clara to understand that these gifts belonged to Jane, especially an electronic puppy Beth got her. Fortunately Jane seemed more interested in the crayons and magnet toys than the puppy initially, so Clara got to play with it a lot.

We spent the rest of the afternoon visiting and keeping the girls from arguing over toys or tangling their balloons. It was overall a pretty relaxing enjoyable day.

11.29.18 Visiting Aujang and Sarah

I haven't seen my friend AJ in person since summer of 2008. Recently he let me know he would be in the bay area for a meeting and then had a couple hours before his flight. So yesterday I drove down to Oakland to see him. I talked with Reece most of the drive down, which gave me some good visiting time with a FB friend no longer on FB and also made the drive go quickly.

I asked AJ to meet met at the Starbucks off Edgewater Drive, which happens to be the Starbucks where I used to study all day while Jack worked at the Walmart next to it. I was slightly proud of myself when I was able to remember how to get there without consulting Google Maps. I was surprised, though, to see the Walmart is now closed. Just an empty unmarked building for now. The Starbucks was also entirely different, which shouldn't have surprised me since it's been years since I've been there and most locations change their indoor arrangements every 6 months or so.

Anyway, I got there early so I enjoyed snipping dance home videos for a compilation project I'm working on. AJ arrived with his friend and business partner Tyler, and we walked to the Chipotle next door so they could get lunch while we visited. We talked for probably 1.5-2 hours about work and relationships, how I met Jack, things like that, and it was really fun. I could have easily visited much longer but they had to go catch their flight. It's wonderful when you reconnect with friends and you immediately are comfortable around each other again.

Since I was already going to be all the way down in Oakland, I had asked Sarah if she's be free to have dinner, and she was. I drove to the Panera she had chosen and kept working on my dance clips (which really make me smile and laugh to myself) until she got there. She bought my dinner (very sweet) since I had driven down, and then we also visited for nearly three hours. We both kept saying we should get going soon but then kept...not doing that, haha. And we made each other laugh pretty hard a few times. It was great.

Overall an unexpected but really nice day of socializing with friends I don't see much. I'm particularly glad Sarah lives in the bay area because, even though we still see each other only every few months, it's a lot more often than we saw each other when she lived in Minnesota.

8.12.18 - Zoo, Dak, Evanston, and Second City

The night before we had walked by a donut shop with a line out the door called Firecakes. Jack suggested we try it out for breakfast. We got there relatively early, I guess, for a Sunday (perhaps 9am) but there was already a line out the door again. Fortunately it moved quickly and meanwhile Jack looked up the menu online so we could decide in advance. They had a lot of different eclectic flavors. Jack was hoping to get a maple bacon donut but apparently they only serve those at their other location. My favorite part of the shop was the décor. It was very tiny, with no inside seating. There were a bunch of old school hand mixers on the wall, a high ceiling, and a mirror facing the register. There were a whole lot of unique flavors including chocolate peanut butter, pistachio, and even birthday cake (which involved two large donuts stacked and iced together). Jack and I got three donuts between us plus some milk. We sat outside in the nice weather and ate quickly.

Then we headed to the El. At first we were thrown off because the stairs to the station allowed entrance only to those who already had passes. There was no place to buy passes for the day. Eventually we figured out that we had to go into Merchandise Mart (a high-end mall-type multi story shopping area that wasn’t even open yet) and get our tickets there, but fortunately the ticket booths were right next to another entrance to the station. We did a quick video interview about how the day prior had gone while we waited for the train. Once we boarded it was only a couple stops until our exit, but it’s amazing how much walking even a few El stops are worth.

We exited and walked through a quiet residential area with a whole lot of shade from enormous old trees. I really enjoy the way people do landscaping around the trees with short iron fencing around the landscaping. We held hands a lot as we headed toward the zoo. We did pause to put on sunscreen, still managing to not get sunburnt despite being outside so often.

We entered the zoo from the south western side and one of the first animals we saw was a red-orange Alpaca that completely reminded me of Kuzco from Emporer’s New Groove, haha. We saw a few other African animals before making our way to the monkey house and, after that, the gorilla house. I find both very interesting because primates seem so similar to us. Jack and I talked about what it would be like if someday a more advanced lifeform—or our next leap in evolution—showed up and caged us and talked about the primitive way we use “phones” to communicate (“Look they can use tools!”) instead of talking telepathically like this theoretical more evolved species. I also enjoyed reading about the average day for gorills and for chimpanzees. I didn’t know chimps ate meat, and I didn’t know gorillas moved around so much. The zoo had one cage of gorillas that were apparently a typical pack of a male, a few females, and some younger ones. But the zoo also had another cage that was a “bachelor’s group” of gorillas: 3-4 younger males who had not yet settled their own families. At one point one of them ran across the cage and it is truly intimidating seeing how quickly such a giant animal can move.

After the gorillas, though, we were met with less success. None of the wild cats seemed to be out and I just kind of felt sorry for the penguins and polar bears in such hot weather. We did make it to the seals, who seemed quite happy with the environment and were swimming rapidly all around and coming up to say hi. We saw them from above ground but also walked around to see them swimming under water. The area was dark and cool and there were little kids squealing with delight as the seals kept swimming by. That was pretty sweet.

After the seals we went to the reptile house, which I always enjoy. It’s cool and dark and, most importantly, reminds me of the first Harry Potter book, which makes me feel very nostalgic. I think about when Harry himself didn’t know anything about the wizarding world, and the reptile house was one of the events leading to him discovering it. So magical. We saw snakes and lizards and bats, and it was really nice. After that we were kind of tired and decided to head back to the El. Our timing was perfect because as we left the zoo we saw dozens and dozens of loud, uniformed, college football players who apparently were having a scavenger hunt at the zoo that day. More power to them, but I wasn’t sorry to be gone once they took over everywhere.

The walk back to the El seemed short and sweet, and then we struggled to stay awake for several more stops north to an area that included Korean BBQ at Dak. My friend Barry, who used to live in Chicago, recommended this restaurant so we decided to check it out. Sarah Bloch met us there too! She had gotten in town late the night before for a weeklong conference, but she had time to see us since it was Sunday. We ate a lot of large BBQ chicken wings as well as “stone bowls” filled with rice and veggies and eggs. And just for the heck of it, Jack got a regular Coke because he wanted to drink it out of the classic glass bottle. Traitor.

When we were done the three of us pushed even further North to Evantson. We walked a few blocks past old brick buildings of back-to-back shops (none of which I remembered at all) to my old apartment. It was vaguely as I remembered it and I remembered the street too. It was interesting but not exactly nostalgic, given my history there. Then we walked another mile or so to Dewey, my former elementary school. That too was surreal. I was only in Evanston for a year at age 10 so the memories are all a bit hazy. We walked around to the back to see the playground and I dimly remembered lining up to go inside and out, the wooden bleachers (if you can call it that—only 2-3 steps on them) in the corner of the playground, and running the mile in the nearby field. Again, can’t say it was nostalgic per se but it was interesting to think I used to be a child there.

After that Jack found us an El station closer to where we had ended up, and we all took it all the way back to the Loop. On the way there we talked about TV shows we found the most compelling, and they almost all seemed to be scifi or occasionally fantasy. (For example I chose, the first couple seasons of LOST and all of Battlestar Galactica.) We also talked about whether Stranger Things should count as fantasy or scifi and how to even distinguish the two. Finally it was mine and Jack’s stop (Sarah was only one further) so we said goodbye and headed back to the hotel.

We had enough time for Jack to take a brief nap and for us to quickly chat with the girls before hurrying back to El to get to our comedy show: The Second City. We were running behind and I was a little worried they wouldn’t let us in if we were late, but it was no problem. I’d reserved the best seats in the house (seats raised up a step with a rail and counter in front of them followed by a walkway, so no one was sitting directly in front of us), and so even though we were late we still had a great view. I went ahead and ordered an AMF and Jack got a beer with a souvenir glass (cool) and we settled in for the show. It was basically a collection of brief skits and a lot of it was improve. We definitely laughed a whole lot. After the two planned acts the cast had an encore of pure improve, and it not only made us laugh but made them crack up at each other too, which was awesome to watch.

When the entire show was over, we walked right next door for our reservations at 1959 Kitchen & Grill. I got a drink called the Painkiller which I loved—it involved rum and pineapple like so many of my other drinks for the trip, but that one may have been the tastiest and easiest to nurse. It turned out we went during karaoke night. At first I didn’t like that because the place was so incredibly loud, but once they really got it going it was great because everyone who went up there was way into it. I think my favorite performance was likely this lone guy singing “Sweet Transvestite” and walking around the entire restaurant singing directly to different people, most of whom got a big kick out of that. We still didn’t stay terribly late because we were wiped, but it was fun while it lasted. We took the El back home (I managed to stay awake so we wouldn’t miss our station. Jack dozed off for a bit.) Then we got back to the hotel and crashed.

4.8.18 - Erin's Paint "Nite" birthday celebration

Today was a nice day.

Jack got up early and went to Starbucks to get some work done for a couple hours before I would leave for the afternoon. When he returned, I took the hour or so drive to Vacaville to join Erin for one of those paint and drinks classes for her birthday. It's pretty appropriate that so much of our friendship blossomed from crafting sessions and now we are celebrating her birthday with more creativity.

Most of the drive there I talked to Neil, which makes the drive go quickly and serves as good visiting time. When I got there, I found a parking spot less than half a block from the location. It had a sign for 2 hour parking only, which would have been a problem, but in smaller print the sign said "Except Sundays." Yesss.

The venue for our painting class.

Erin was already there when I walked in and she had reserved seats for her group. Sarah arrived not long after. I'm really glad she was able to make it. Vacaville is roughly halfway between us and so a shorter trip than if she had hauled all the way to my place.

Erin was kind enough to buy the tickets for the paint event, which is so sweet, and so the only cost to me was gas to get there and money for food or drinks. However I am trying to spend a bit less because this time of year there are so many birthdays and Mother's and Father's day coming up and it takes a toll on our budget. So I ordered a slice of pizza (one of the less expensive options). To my delight, the "slice" they brought me was huge! Easily as big as a personal pan pizza, just slice shaped. So that was a pleasant surprise. Later on Sarah treated me to a glass of sangria, which by the way was delicious.

It was pleasant sitting in the sunshine (indoors but near a wall of windows) between Erin and Sarah and painting and visiting. And I like the way my painting turned out--I added some stormy clouds for contrast. I think this is the third one of these types of classes I've been to, and at the end I always enjoy seeing the different twists everyone puts on their own paintings.

Erin's painting on the left, mine on the right

On the drive home I talked to Julie most of the way, which was again pleasant and made the drive go fast. It helped that there was very little traffic. When I got back, Clara was very interested in my painting and wanted to just lay on our bed and look at it, so that's pretty high praise. I showed her where the sun, clouds, sky, ocean, and beach were, and she kept pointing to each and naming them. Very sweet.

12.27.17 - drinks with David and Sarah

David and Sarah and I met at Llewellyn's in old town St. Charles. We sat at a tall table for 6 near the door but since it was only a Wednesday we weren't taking up needed space. I got a rum and Diet that tasted like almost all rum; David said the same about his gin (don't remember what the drink was supposed to be), so next I ordered a very sweet Moscato and that was much better. All three of us split some soft pretzels, and David ended up paying for everything because, so he claimed, Sarah and I had come all the way to Missouri and it was the least he could do. Very kind.

We had a great time. We got there about 7 and stayed until nearly 11 just talking and laughing so much. I can't remember all of it now but I know we made jokes about exes and the Ghost of Christmas Present leading them to us at that table, laughing hard about old stories. I was definitely crying laughing at several points. At one point it was also a bit somber as I vented to them about Clara's speech issues, but they listened well and I appreciated that, and we still ended up laughign more before the night was over. It's so rare we are all in town together but it would be nice to make it a Christmas tradition.

6.30.17 - June joy statuses

6.17.17 - My Birthday

Today was a wonderful day.

But first: throughout the week I received a bunch of Amazon Prime packages from my mom and siblings with all this new kitchen stuff. Most of it was stuff we already owned but needed to replace as part of our gluten free kitchen, but in addition to that Julie bought me the Magic Bullet blender, which I was pretty excited to start using once we cleared counter space for it.

And it comes with labeled gluten free recipes!

I also got several cards in the mail (Dad, Merlene, Jack's Grandma, Sarah) but I saved them all to open on the actual day.

And then last night Jack took Clara with him to IKEA to get the wall bookshelves he was buying and installing for my birthday. At the time I didn't know where he was getting the shelves, but when I later found out it made the gift all the more endearing because I think going to and through IKEA is kind of a hassle, but especially with a toddler.

And I love the shelves! I've been feeling more cramped in our little apartment now that we have four people and all the supplies that come with an infant out again. Finding ways to use the walls for storage and free up some of the rest of the place is a great gift in itself - and he did everything from pick them out to install them so I didn't even have to be involved. Now our bedroom looks more literary than ever and our desk looks far less cluttered!

I had also recently ordered a magnetic knife holder off Amazon Prime for the same reason. When Jack got back from IKEA he installed the knife holder and one of the bookshelves, but we decided to wait on the other shelf because it was getting late and we didn't want to annoy the neighbors.

So all of this birthday goodness happened before my birthday had even arrived.

Then this morning I fed Jane and experimentally placed her in the crib, and she slept peacefully there for over an hour! For context, so far she hasn't really slept in the crib more than 10-15 minutes at a time. Having Jane sleep on not-me and not-Jack so easily really made the morning relaxing. I guess that was my birthday gift from her!

For a little while Clara and I played "Sister Mary Mommy," which consists of her handing me one of her blankets and me putting it over my head like a nun's habit and then smiling and saying "Sister Mary Mommy!" Then we do it with her and I say "Sister Mary Clara!" Then repeat. She loves it. She laughs so hard. And since Jane was asleep I was able to spend the time with Clara uninterrupted, which is especially nice since I feel like I haven't gotten to interact with Clara as much the last few weeks.

Several people texted me birthday greetings during the day, but my favorite was Dad's:

Although I just realized he got my age wrong. Eh, close enough.

Once when I was a kid I went with Dad to pick out a Christmas tree, and the tree farm we went to had a short tree, only a few feet tall. It came exactly up to my nose and the top of Dad's back pocket, and he pointed that out. Then for the next few days (or weeks, I don't remember) he would ask me how tall the tree was compared to me and compared to him, so many times that I never forgot it, and now we can both sit back and marvel at how small I used to be compared to now. Anyway it was a sweet throwback.

During the morning Jack helped me clean up the apartment a bit, partly for my own sanity and partly because Erin and Rachel were coming over later. He even cleaned the bathroom, probably my least favorite chore, so that was very helpful.

At some point both Ellen and later Julie called to wish me Happy Birthday. Ellen and I talked a lot about Netflix shows, including Bloodline and The OA (which I had just finished the day before or so). Julie and I talked mostly about kids and raising toddlers. Either way I don't talk to either of them on the phone very often so that was nice.

I also opened all my birthday cards. Dad sent a funny one with a joke about "mom brain" and three dollar bills. Sarah sent a sweet one that said when she is with me and my family she feels like she's home. <3 And Merlene and Jack's grandma both sent checks, which frankly helped me feel better about not getting any work done that weekend.

In the early afternoon Jack stayed with the girls and I went out to get my free Starbucks drink. I go to Starbucks all the time throughout the year, but I still get excited about my free birthday drink each year. Just another gesture to make the day special. I splurged and got a venti mocha frap with whipped cream and everything, and while I ordered and waited for it I chatted with the barista about my birthday plans. It was one of the Starbucks I go to regularly and she recognized me. The last time I'd been there she had remembered I used to be pregnant (and wasn't any longer) and we had talked about our kids for awhile. I don't think either of us remember each other's names but it's still nice to have some familiar faces around where we live and feel at home.

I took my cool and delicious frap (perfect for this increasingly hot weather) and drove a little further down the street to Safeway, where I picked out some ice cream. It was on sale BOGO so it ended up being even less expensive than Walmart Neighborhood Market, a rarity. Then I took all my treats home just in time to get there before Erin and Rachel arrived.

They both came bearing gifts: Erin brought gluten free chocolate muffins (awww) and some apple cider and sangria. Rachel had brought us a stainless steel pots and pans set! I had actually specifically told Rachel not to worry about a gift because she's already driving all the way from and to the bay area to hang out, and I think that's gift enough. But she said she had some kind of discount and gift card or something so she just got it for us. That was touching.

Then they both helped me remove all our old dishes and cookware that have been glutened and replace with all the kitchen stuff I got for my birthday. Specifically Rachel helped by bringing in a bunch of tote bags from her car and sorting things into Goodwill vs trash and also dividing some of the nicer stuff among her and Erin to take home. And Erin helped by holding Jane the whole time. This always sounds like a simple task but it makes a huge difference.

We got through a lot of the kitchen before it was really getting to be time to head out. Erin and Rachel had split a Groupon so we could all go to Revolution Wines and enjoy some child-free visiting and wine sipping.

We arrived there in the middle of Happy Hour, which was perfect. We enjoyed an easy going atmosphere (people around but not overly crowded or noisy) and olives and ciabatta, fancy mac'n'cheese, a cheese plate, and several glasses of wine, all while talking for hours. We talked about our relationships and Erin's wedding and all sorts of odds and ends. It was a very good visit.

And Erin and Rachel still stuck around for a while when we got home and we enjoyed the gluten free muffins and ice cream together. We did stick a candle in a muffin and they sang me Happy Birthday, but that was really for Clara's benefit and for some reason she found it upsetting and had to be consoled. I think it makes her feel put on the spot. But the treats she had after helped her get over it quickly.

Ice cream and Cheerio face is over it.

Not long after the girls left, Neil called and we talked maybe half an hour about my day and his work and whatever. It doesn't really matter what we're talking about: Neil often makes me laugh pretty hard. I ended up getting off the phone with him when Renata called to say Happy Birthday, and she and I talked about 45 minutes about what's going on with us. I told her about how I had only two glasses of wine when I was out, and when we got back Erin asked if we wanted sangria or if we were all "drinked out." Renata and I laughed about how different that was then our celebrations in our early twenties, such as my 23rd birthday in Missouri, when we ended the night drunkenly at Waffle House wearing tiaras. How times have changed. Then we reminisced for awhile about that summer and how wonderful and formative it turned out to be. So glad we shared that together.

Renata and me during my 23rd birthday celebration, about 9 years ago now.

Not long after that I talked to Mom on the phone and told her all about my nice day. And when I was finally done with phone calls I got to listen to four voicemails of various Jacksons singing me "Happy Birthday"! (One VM from Don & Merlene, one from Dave & Meghan, and 2 from Aaron and Katie for some reason, the last of which was pretty funny because Aaron kept talking about how he hoped I listened to the VMs in order, otherwise I would just be too confused to understand.)

And throughout the day, of course, I also got birthday greetings on FB from people. These were my favorites:

The whole day was filled with good food and conversation and reminders of how many friends I have. It was very nice!

6.3.17 - Sarah and Shannon's visits

Before Jane was born, Sarah mentioned she'd like to come up and help out after. I explained we had family in town through the end of May, so this last week Sarah called to ask if she could come up this weekend to help out.

She got here yesterday evening and she came bearing fresh vegetables. I had texted earlier in the day to let her know we have tofu (from when Don and Merlene were here) that I'd like to use before it goes bad, so she planned to make a gluten-free stir fry. When she got here she improvised a peanut butter soy sauce (after checking to make sure the soy sauce was gluten free) and she cooked brown rice, sauteed the tofu, and sauteed chopped up veggies. While she was doing that I sat in the kitchen with her and we each had drinks that were half Riesling and half orange juice and caught up. Jane slept on her coffee table makeshift crib almost that whole time, so cooperatively.

While Sarah was waiting for things to cook she also unloaded and reloaded the dishwasher and just generally looked for other ways to help. She crashed on our (awesome) air mattress for the night and the next day (today) she just stayed around with me while Jack was at work and helped watch Clara while I attended to Jane. I was worried Sarah would think she wasn't doing all that much, but I explained to her that just being around to take things away from Clara (pens, paintbrushes, whatever) and keep an eye on her. Otherwise I'd be getting up and down while holding Jane all day and that gets exhausting. Plus Sarah kept me company and gave me an adult to have interesting conversations with instead of just feeling cooped in the apartment with two tiny girls all day. It really makes a pretty big difference.

It was really nice to get so much one-on-one time with Sarah and catch up with how she's doing at work (trying to get a manuscript published) and with Mark (steady as ever) and everything else.

Later in the day Shannon came over with a bunch of samples of gluten free foods she likes. Each sample included a label of what it was and where she'd bought it. She brought crackers, raisin bread, an English muffin, a hot dog bun, and some cereal. What we did offer to Clara she liked, and I expect she's going to like all of it in the end. Shannon also said she would email me some GF recipes she's liked. It was very sweet for her to make the trip just to help me come up with ideas. And she also was willing and happy to hold Jane or help with Clara.

Shannon's labeled GF samples.

Interestingly, Clara warmed to Shannon almost instantly, which she doesn't normally do with people she hasn't seen in a long time (doesn't remember). We did see Shannon just about two months ago, but I didn't think Clara's memory was that long. It didn't hurt that Shannon tossed Clara in the air a bunch of times, making Clara giggle like crazy. I said something about how Clara is getting heavier and Shannon pointed out that she does the same move with weights much heavier at CrossFit, haha. Clara even gave Shannon a hug before Shannon and Sarah left. It was very sweet.

12.4.16 - First weekend of December

This month is off to a great start. On December 1, I practiced my thesis presentation twice, including once for Jack, who had some good follow up questions. I felt pretty good about it. On December 2, I practiced twice more, and then Jack, Clara, and I all got dressed up and drove to Davis for the actual presentation.

Clara's fancy outfit.

We got to see Erin, Braden, Rachel, Shannon, and Julianna. It felt good that they all came to watch. I also got to introduce Clara to interim director Fred and program chair Kent, who thought she was adorable.

Jack, Clara, and me just before my presentation.

I was the first to give my presentation, and it went just fine. I actually really enjoy speaking in front of crowds and wouldn't have minded if there had been a larger crowd there. Either way I was proud of the presentation because I had intentionally tried to make it easy to follow even for people without much DNA background. Nearly every slide was mostly pictures more than data, and afterward a few people told me they enjoyed it, including people without much science background at all. I was pretty pleased about that. I only got two questions in the end and they were both very easy, and then that was it. I was done with the presentation and with my entire master's degree!

Screencap from the video of my presentation.

Jack and Clara made it through a good 75% of the presentation before Clara got too chatty and Jack had to take her in the hallway. Fortunately he'd already seen me practice so he wasn't missing much. I decided to go ahead and stay a bit after so I could have some of the delicious free dinner they always offer, including some fudgy brownies. Then we drove home and Jack and I got a chance to talk about how it all went and how good it is to be done. I can't believe writing the thesis, writing the manuscript, giving the presentation, and my overall master's degree are all finally off my to do list!

The next day (Saturday, December 3), Erin came over in the morning (bringing a hot chocolate for me) and we started making Christmas cards. Janice skyped with us for most of the time we were together--had to be at least 3-4 hours--while on her end she worked on table numbers for Erin's wedding reception next summer. It wasn't exactly the same as having Janice here in person but it was pretty close.

It may have been the most productive card-making session we've ever had. I made 10 cards in the time Erin was here, and I think she made about 7. It helped that I have all the more craft supplies now thanks to Sarah's generosity; she moved earlier this year and while cleaning out her stuff decided to send me a box of high quality craft supplies (card stock, new punches, ribbons, etc.) that she never really gets around to using. So that made it all the more fun.

Just some of the cards Erin and I made.

In the background we alternated between Clara's youtube Christmas playlist and my Spotify Christmas playlist.

One of the videos from Clara's Christmas playlist.

For the most part Clara did a great job keeping herself busy (Jack was shut in his room studying for a test Monday). She did sit with us at the table a few different times and examine the many objects we had on the table--it looked almost like the pages of an I Spy book. Eventually she finally went down for a nap and she was still asleep when Erin left.

A table like an I Spy book.

Now I have the hot chocolate potluck to look forward to next week! Love this season.

9.24.16 - craft potluck

Erin, Rachel, and Sarah came over for what was originally going to be an autumn-themed craft potluck, but since the weather was still reaching the 90s and since I needed to make going away and get well soon cards instead, it was more just a generic craft potluck. It was still really enjoyable though.

I had been having a pretty hard week, even up to as recently as that morning, and I had considered cancelling the get together, but I'm really glad I didn't. It was good to be around friends and focus on pleasant things for awhile. Plus it was my first day off calorie counting since I started another bet with Dad, and that in itself made the day wonderful. Erin brought sliced French bread with salami and Brie and white cheddar and apple butter. Sarah brought a salad that involved (I think) walnuts. I made chocolate chip banana bread and Rachel brought chips and dips. It was way more food than we could eat (as potlucks almost always are) but it was delicious.

Then we just sat around the kitchen table and visited. Rachel and Sarah colored pages from Sarah's coloring book (one of those ones for adults with very complicated pictures). Erin and I made cards - she made two birthday cards and I made a going away card for our program director and the (second) get well soon card for my grandmother.

At different points throughout the visit Sarah and also Erin talked about how wonderfully relaxing these craft get togethers are. It made me very happy that they said that because I sometimes wonder if people are bored. I definitely enjoy them though. All together they stayed about 6 hours!

I was hoping to do another get together in October to make either Halloween or Thanksgiving cards, but the schedule looks incredibly busy. However I have already scheduled what has become the annual hot chocolate potluck for December, so that's something to look forward to.

6.27.16 - Craft Alcohol Potluck

Last Saturday I had my unofficial belated birthday celebration by having Shannon, Rachel, Erin, Sarah, and Gennilyn over for a potluck/crafting session.

Before they arrived I woke up in peaceful quiet, showered, finished cleaning a few odds and ends, and started making spinach sausage loaf. At first I was watching GoT S6 while I did it, but then Sarah got there earlier than I expected, so we had some time to visit one-on-one, which was nice. She brought cheese and salami and crackers and a liver pate. Always so food fancy. She also brought a bottle of Bacardi for the potluck and a bottle of wine for me for my birthday. J

While it was just us Mom Skyped so I could see Jack and Clara, although Clara didn’t seem terribly interested and I was a little distracted with getting the spinach sausage loaf in the oven. It was still nice to see them briefly.

Not too long after, Rachel, Erin, and Shannon arrived. Rachel brought chips, 7-layer-dip, zero calorie lemon-lime La Croix, and gin. She made us some very fresh cool lemon lime drinks, and even though I’m usually partial to really sweet stuff, this was great too.  Shannon brought sliced fresh fruit and Erin brought everything needed for chocolate fondue, including the fondue pot! She even brought pretzels for it.

So of course, it being a potluck, we had waaaay more food and drink than we were ever going to consume in one day, but it was fun to try everything. Even the liver pate was good. I don’t think I’ve had anything liver-related before.

Gennilyn got there a little bit late but still in plenty of time and she brought more Angry Orchard with her, plus a Starbucks gift card for my birthday (always a hit!). We sat around the kitchen table and talked for probably at least two hours. We talked about our programs and internships and all that stuff, but we also talked about politics for a while, or at least about how our families handle politics (some are a lot more direct than others) and whether we see eye-to-eye with our parents on political topics. At some point I was talking about the latest attempt to block people on no-fly lists from having guns and I mentioned the ACLU was against it. I was surprised to find that 2-3 of the women there didn’t know what the ACLU was. I guess it’s just easy to forget that we have different focuses in life and maybe I’m more focused on politics than most of my friends.

The whole time we were chatting I enjoyed very cheesy spinach sausage loaf, cherries dipped in dark chocolate fondue, and one Angry Orchard apple cider after another. It was a lot of fun. It was also great that I could just hang out and relax without having to keep checking on and course-altering things for a little toddler.

Eventually we moved from the kitchen table to around the coffee table and at least Erin and I started making some cards. I made a science-ish one for Yvette’s upcoming birthday. I also found a picture of some very serious statues and added party hats and streamers to make a birthday card for Jill. Her birthday isn’t for a while yet but it’s one of the next ones on the horizon. Erin made a very cool and meta wish-you-were-here card of us making cards for Janice.

By the time everyone left I thought it was around 6pm (we had started at noon) but turned out it was closer to 8:15p! Time really flew, plus it was still light out since we were only a few days past the longest day of the year.

Sarah stayed because she was spending the night, so she and I visited more one-on-one talking about relationships and family and stuff. I was so physically tired though that I spent most of that visiting time lying on the living room floor or my bed, depending on which room we were in.