6.12.21 - Joy status: Friends to help us move

We are almost done loading the truck and we are almost ready to depart for Missouri and we wouldn't have been as ready as we are now if it wasn't for a whole lot of help from our dear friends. People have helped pack over the last week or two, and then today load the truck itself, grab food and water for everyone, keep the kids busy, pack (tons of) last minute things, dismantle and move heavy furniture, make donation runs, scrub walls, and basically anything else I could think of to ask. Thank you, thank you! We have so many good friends.

7.13.19 - Renata's day visit

Even though Renata lives much closer now (San Francisco), our schedules are such that we rarely see each other, so a few weeks ago we picked a date to stick to, and that was today.

I got some work done in the morning and then Jack helped me clean the apartment relatively thoroughly. Amazing how much we can get done when (1) Jane is asleep and Clara is watching a video and (2) we are kind of hurrying because we have company coming over. This might be the cleanest my desk has been since I assembled it.

Jack left to study for the NCLEX and Jane woke up shortly before Renata arrived. Renata came bearing gifts: gluten free pizza, rotisserie chicken, mashed potatoes, watermelons and cantaloupes, and toys. She brought this adorable mermaid-themed tea set and a Melissa & Doug set of fake food. She also brought some very cute baby boy clothes for Calvin.

At first Jane was being very shy and just laying against me on the couch not looking at Renata, but Clara was excited to see her and very excited about the toys. They started playing with the tea set right away (which Clara informed us was actually hot chocolate) while Renata and I visited. Of course eventually Jane warmed up and started also pouring hot chocolate and putting pieces of food on plates to hand to Renata and me. Clara also handed food to her stuffed elephant, Fawn, and stuffed puppy, Jelly.

It was wonderful having Renata here. I'm in the last month of pregnancy and I am very easily tired and irritable. I'm struggling to be home with the girls by myself because it inherently requires getting up and down so much. Renata took care of a million little things so I could stay seated on the couch (getting Jane her cup, getting the girls food, helping the girls wipe off their faces, etc etc) and it really does make a huge difference. Besides that, she kept me very awake and alert because we were animatedly visiting the whole time. She briefly had to leave in the middle to pick up Mia from the groomer's, and while she was gone I was struggling to stay awake while the girls watched a movie. As soon as she returned it was easy.

And it was great catching up with her! I've been thinking recently about Renata, actually, and how she is one of my female friends who I resonate with specifically in terms of how direct she is and how readily she advocates for herself. These are qualities I've always liked about her and have come to appreciate more as time goes on.

The girls were fairly excited to see Mia, who is a smaller dog and very even-tempered and relaxed. Clara very carefully would pet Mia and Renata let Clara give some dog treats. Jane mostly observed. At one point Mia barked a few times--not that aggressively in my opinion, but it frightened Jane. But I held her for a bit and she recovered quickly. We took the girls and Mia around the complex for a walk. I loved the summery outfits they ended up wearing--Jane so cool in her sunglasses (which she specifically requested), and Clara looking a little "punk rock" (so I told her) in a frilly tulle pink skirt with bright green and red ninja turtle boots. It had been a hot day and even then at past 6 pm it was pretty warm, but at least a lot of the complex was in shade and it was a tolerable warm. Mia can be off leash and totally fine, even when other dogs are around. It was pretty impressive.

We went back to the apartment and had some of the tangerine popsicles Renata had brought for us. We ate them on the front porch/balcony so the inevitable drips wouldn't get all over the apartment complex. Amazingly we couldn't get Jane to try one, but she happily brought the tea set out to us--one piece at a time--while we ate. Clara enjoyed her popsicle very much until it started melting on her hand, so Renata showed her how to wrap a paper towel around the stick to hold it. Ultimately Renata ended up holding it for Clara while she ate, and then we put the rest in a bowl and let her eat it with a spoon.

She stayed and visited with me until it was time to put the girls to bed, and even then she helped clean up the apartment while I got them ready. When she and Mia left the girls ran to the nursery and watched them out the window as they went to their car, waving and saying bye. Renata turned what would have been a long, tiring, slightly boring, difficult day into a really fun summer-themed visit, and I am so glad she came up!

12.8.18 - 5th Annual Hot Chocolate Potluck!

Today was the 5th annual hot chocolate potluck, and it makes me really happy that it's become such a tradition.

Erin's picture of her mug.

Jack and I spent the morning cleaning the apartment. It actually took a lot longer than I thought, but that's because we were being particularly thorough. For example he cleaned up the nursery and our room really well even though it was unlikely anyone would go in there, and I cleaned out the fridge and wiped down the oven and other things we normally don't get to. I don't think we really needed to go to that level just for our guests but I'm glad we did because if we don't clean that much when we're having a bunch of guests, when would we? Even now after it's all over the apartment is much cleaner than typical, which is great.

Sadly, Sarah had to cancel last minute because she's sick, so I took Jane and went to Safeway to pick up candy canes (one of the items Sarah was going to bring) plus chocolate chips for my gluten free brownies. It was fun running the quick errand with Jane, who was very happy to be in the shopping cart watching the aisles of products go by. She was giggling a lot. I let her hold the box of candy canes while we were checking out and she was very interested at first. But after I scanned the box and gave it back to her she threw it over her shoulder into the shopping cart basket, haha.

About 30 minutes before guests were supposed to arrive I put both Clara and Jane down for naps in the hopes they would sleep the full amount. Clara hardly ever takes naps now but I thought it would be best to try because she is getting over a cold and I knew the day would be very stimulating. She protested at first but I told her "You take a nap, and then you'll see Henry!" and she seemed happy about that and got into bed pretty willingly.

I told Henry about that when he arrived not long after and he thought it was pretty cool. He arrived early because traffic was lighter than he thought but it was nice to visit with him extra. He brought chips, chocolate and caramel syrup, grapes, and fruit juice. He also brought us an Amazon Echo Dot (an "Alexa") his work had given him, and he and Jack spent some time setting it up. Almost immediately Clara announced "Alexa! Play 'Ice Cream Truck!'" and the Dot started playing this soothing children's instrumental sounding song. Clara know's how to do it because Beth has an Echo Dot too.

Erin and Braden arrived with many fancy cheeses, salami, crakcers, hot cocoa mix and whipped cream. Rachel came with more whipped cream, different kinds of sprinkles, chips and all kinds of dips (pico de gallo, guac, etc), and two miniature gluten free cakes! (One carrot cake, one "midnight" chocolate ganache.)

At some point around here both girls were awake. I brought Clara out and left Jane in the hope she'd sleep longer since it had been only 40 minutes or so. Clara acted shy and laid in the hallway under her Marauder's Map blanket, slowly crawling/scooting closer to the living room to see what was going on. Jane was distraught and would not go back to sleep, so I went and got her and she cuddled me while watching everyone. We just sat on the couch and observed people visiting and prepping food, and I can't say I minded all the baby cuddles, although I wondered if she was going to be that way all afternoon/evening. Clara warmed up pretty quickly and started playing with Henry.

Singing "Jingle Bells" to Henry.

Around then Renata and Kaisen arrived with not only gluten free pizza and a rotisserie chicken but also (1) the best ugly Christmas sweaters (Renata's lights up when she moves) and (2) a Minnie toy set for Clara and Jane that has a bunch of snap on dresses, bows, purses, and shoes as well as (Clara's favorite part) two little kittens and a dog for Minnie.

Jane still wanted to only cuddle me but Clara was very excited and she and Henry and later Kaisen explored the set together. Erin very kindly made me a mug of cocoa complete with whipped cream and chocolate sprinkles and I sat in the corner by the Christmas tree holding Jane and chatting with Henry and then Renata. Eventually Jane was prepared to be passed off to Jack and I got a bit more mobile, and ultimately of course Jane warmed up entirely and was wandering around everyone checking out the action.

Renata and I had a pretty good one-on-one visit and talked about work, NCLEX, her dog sitter, how the siblings are doing, all sorts of things. It's a good crew because everyone already knows one or more other guests so it isn't a tricky hosting situation to keep people included.

After we had all ate and visited for awhile we decided to start games. In years past we've either visited the entire time or maybe played Paper Game or had a few people play Tichu while others visit. This year we decided to try Quiplash. Jack had set up a Steam account on our desktop in advance and Neil let us use his credentials.

The game was a huge hit. I'm a big fan because it's easy to move around and keep playing despite interruptions, since everything is done from your phone. We had a good crew for similar senses of humor--in fact in several cases the answers were nearly identical (essential oils, fake pockets, others I can't remember now). Kaisen and Braden in particular seemed to laugh a lot but I know Erin also loved it because she encouraged us to play several more rounds. It was great. And to make it even better, Clara pulled up her own chair amongst the adults and sat watching and laughing a lot. Even Jane would start laughing (a bit fake sounding but very hard) when all the adults laughed.

It was so adorable because neither of them have any idea what we're talking about but they think it's really funny that we think something is so funny. Clara also loves the game's background music and sound effects and she kept tugging on Rachel's shirt to point both out to her.

Eventually Renata and Kaisen had to get back to their dog sitter, but the rest of us played a few more rounds of Quiplash before switching to Bomb Squad (or whatever the game is called) - it's a game where four people have to work cooperatively to defuse bombs. It's highly strategic. Henry and I sat out and kept an eye on the kids and watched the game, and Jack, Braden, Erin, and Rachel all played. They were pretty into it. I love using Steam games for parties. Really fun, no clean up, kids can't really interrupt.

Dance party to the sound track of Bomb Squad Academy.

Not long after that everyone except Henry headed out. He stayed and helped clean up and play with the kids a bit more, and I showed him the birthday gift I've already made for Dad, which he thought was really good. We visited a while longer until it was time to put the kids to bed, then he headed out too.

Jack and I got the kids to bed around the usual time, 8pm - 8:15pm or so. What was unusual was how tired we both were. I went to sleep as soon as they were down--I didn't even get under the covers until I woke up again later. Jack also came to bed at like 9pm, which is early for him. That's why I was awake today (Sunday) at 6:15am--it had already been like 10 hours of sleep, which felt great. Now I have some quiet time in the morning before anyone else wakes up to record the day. :)

6.15.18 - More summer joys

3.10.18 - Clara's 3rd Birthday Party

First of all, the day started off wonderful because we got Clara's tTG-IgG results back and she is in normal range for the first time since her Celiac diagnosis. So I was elated about that.

The girls woke up happy and for a little while, Clara, Jane, and I hung out on Clara's bed. Clara pointed to one stuffed animal at a time and said, for example, "Gray Mouse sleep?" Then I would tuck Gray Mouse under the Marauder's Map blanket next to Clara and we'd pretend he was snoring, and then she'd ask for another. At the peak she had Gray Mouse, Cat, her sippy cup, Elephant, and Bobo all tucked in to "sleep" with her.

Jane kept trying to grab the sippy cup and other animals even if I gave her different toys to play with. She and Clara often are most interested in the specific toy the other is playing with, haha.

Jack and I got the girls dressed in their matching "Happy Birthday" shirts that (I believe) Beth had bought for them. I was hoping Jane would take her "I've been up for an hour and now need a morning nap" nap on time so she would wake up on time and we could get to the train museum (technically the Northern California Railroad Museum) early. But Jane didn't want to go to sleep. Eventually I let her cry it out and after about five minutes she passed out. 

By then Mom had arrived and she and Clara and I visited. Clara ate Cocoa Pebbles (and got them everywhere) and we listened to Spotify and I tried to clean up the apartment more in anticipation of Renata coming to visit later in the afternoon. 

Clara just hanging out in the laundry basket while we cleaned up.

Jane slept longer than she typically does in the morning, and I actually went in and woke her up near 11am. I fed her one more time and then we all got ready to leave for thet rain museum. I put on Clara's shoes and coat before the rest of us were completely ready, which means she stood as close as possible to the front door holding her blanket and sippy cup and continually looking over her shoulder wondering why we weren't leaving yet. It was pretty cute.

It didn't take us long to get to old town Sacramento, and Mom paid the $10 for parking so we wouldn't have to worry about leaving the museum to feed the meter or move the car. We brought the double stroller with us. I love that thing. Clara can see just fine from the front seat and it makes it a lot easier to move the girls around. 

There is a decent sized train in the lobby when you first walk in and wait to buy tickets. Certainly the train is vastly bigger than any toy train we have, and Clara was pretty interested in it. I didn't realize, though, how humongous the trains are in the actual museum. The first room you walk into has a very high ceiling nad is designed to look like a mountain area. Clara was pretty impressed with the huge black engine--and when I learned the engine was one of the originals from the first California railroads, I was pretty impressed too. 

We walked past several large trains until we got to the part of the museum where you can actually go up into the cars and look outside. We checked out a mail car and a car from the "bullet train" from the 1960s. We also looked at the inside of (I think) an oil engine, which had a flickering orange light where the fire box would be. Clara was very interested in that. 

Sitting together on the Bullet Train.

There was one train that had a row of telephones receivers hooked up next to it; you could pick them up and listen to a recording of the information about the train. I think that's the first time in Clara's life she's seen an old school telephone headset (as opposed to cell phones). She tested it out but if she put her ear to the earpiece, the mouthpiece was too far from her face, and vice versa. She kept moving her face back and forth to try to fit it to the phone, haha.

Once we had finished exploring the ground floor we realized our map said the third floor has a whole kids section. That was easily the best part of the museum. There was a beautiful and elaborate trainset with at least four trains running in different directions on different levels. It had several bridges and tunnels and a hot air balloon. Clara stared at it for a very long time, which was fine with me because I enjoyed checking out all the detail. It reminded me of Grandpa Benoist and I thought about how much he would have enjoyed that set and this museum trip with us. <3

Clara was reluctant to leave the set until she saw all of the kids train sets (set up at kid-height tables) in the next part of the museum. There was also an electric Thomas the train running on a relatively small track that had a big plastic bubble in its center. Kids could crawl under the table and stand up in the bubble to watch the train run around them. Clara loved that too. 

After she watched the Thomas train for a quite a while she emerged and played with the toy (Brio) train sets too.

By now we had been at the museum about two hours and I was tired and I could tell both girls were tired. We packed them up to head home. On the way out we stopped by the gift store and got a penny pressed as a souveneir. We let Clara hold it as we went back to the car.

It wasn't five minutes after buckling the girls in that they both passed out on the way home. And, amazingly, they stayed asleep as we moved them into the apartment: Clara slept in her jacket on her bed, and Jane slept in the carseat in our room, both for over an hour.

During that quiet time Mom baked the gluten free birthday cake and I went through a bunch of my photos for Facebook. Renata texted to say she was running a bit late, which actually works out fine because it gave the girls more quiet time to nap. Jane finally woke up and I nursed her, and then Clara woke up and had time to recover from napping all before Renata got there.

Renata and her dog Mia arrived just as we were putting candles in the cake. Renata had brought another present as well as a mylar balloon that said "Happy Birthday!" Clara was overwhelmed with excitedment to suddenly have a balloon and a dog in the apartment. Jane was also fascinated by Mia.

We sang Happy Birthday but kind of softly and mostly to the cake, as opposed to Clara, so she wouldn't feel put on the spot. (Last year during my birthday I held Clara in my lap while just Erin, Rachel, and Jack sang Happy Birthday, and Clara still cried. Too much pressure, I guess.) Clara didn't understand blowing out the candles so I did it for her. Then she asked to do it again...and again watched as I did it for her, haha. But she certainly understood getting to eat cake and was happy to do it. So was Jane.

Clara still doesn't really get presents. She knows what they're called but she hasn't made the connection that (1) she is allowed to rip the wrapping paper off and (2) there's usually something pretty fun and exciting inside. She was more interested in playing with each gift after she opened it than in moving onto the next gift, but that's actually kind of nice. We opened about half the gifts and then let her play with them for a while before opening the rest. Beth got her a Minnie Mouse that has snap on dresses and shoes, and Clara was pretty interested in that. She was also happy to stack her new ASL ABC blocks from Jama. Don & Merlene got her a Brio trainset, and Jack set it up on the coffee table. Clara was very into it. But the prize toy, for sure, was the electric trainset Renata brought. Jack set that one oup on the kitchen table (it just fit) and Clara sat and watched it go round for quite a while. At one point I grabbed a few finger puppets from the bath toys and put them in one of the train cars, and Clara gave an excited "Oh ho ho!" Adorable. 

Jack went out and bought food to make a green salad and bake some gluten free pizza, and we all had dinner together. It was great visiting with Renata. She has just last week moved back to the bay area to try a new (challenging) job, and she's nervous, but I am really happy to have her closer by again. I hope she manages to visit semi-regularly, that would be great. While we talked Jane and Clara kept wandering after Mia, who wasn't too sure how she felt about all the attention. Once we had Jane in her high seat and Clara eating pizza, though, (which she loved) Mia did better. She's a pretty sweet dog. Pretty quiet.

Suddenly I realized it was 8:30 based on how much Jane was rubbing her eyes. I have to say Jane was great the entire day--never very fussy, just along for the ride. I went and nursed her down and she passed out in our bed. Renata and Mia headed out, Mom changed Clara into pajamas, and we all hung out a bit longer and visited and cleaned up somewhat. When I went to put Clara to bed she gave me a very long hug, and I rocked her back and forth and thought about how I can't believe it's already been three years since she was born, and how it will be a blink of an eye before she's 13 and then 23. It's bittersweet to think of, but it was wonderful to realize for now she's still my little toddler that I can hold in my arms and cuddle. I love her so much.

So yeah, it was a pretty great birthday.

2.28.18 - February joy statuses

2.14.18 - Renata is moving back north

(Pic actually taken in mid-March)

6.17.17 - My Birthday

Today was a wonderful day.

But first: throughout the week I received a bunch of Amazon Prime packages from my mom and siblings with all this new kitchen stuff. Most of it was stuff we already owned but needed to replace as part of our gluten free kitchen, but in addition to that Julie bought me the Magic Bullet blender, which I was pretty excited to start using once we cleared counter space for it.

And it comes with labeled gluten free recipes!

I also got several cards in the mail (Dad, Merlene, Jack's Grandma, Sarah) but I saved them all to open on the actual day.

And then last night Jack took Clara with him to IKEA to get the wall bookshelves he was buying and installing for my birthday. At the time I didn't know where he was getting the shelves, but when I later found out it made the gift all the more endearing because I think going to and through IKEA is kind of a hassle, but especially with a toddler.

And I love the shelves! I've been feeling more cramped in our little apartment now that we have four people and all the supplies that come with an infant out again. Finding ways to use the walls for storage and free up some of the rest of the place is a great gift in itself - and he did everything from pick them out to install them so I didn't even have to be involved. Now our bedroom looks more literary than ever and our desk looks far less cluttered!

I had also recently ordered a magnetic knife holder off Amazon Prime for the same reason. When Jack got back from IKEA he installed the knife holder and one of the bookshelves, but we decided to wait on the other shelf because it was getting late and we didn't want to annoy the neighbors.

So all of this birthday goodness happened before my birthday had even arrived.

Then this morning I fed Jane and experimentally placed her in the crib, and she slept peacefully there for over an hour! For context, so far she hasn't really slept in the crib more than 10-15 minutes at a time. Having Jane sleep on not-me and not-Jack so easily really made the morning relaxing. I guess that was my birthday gift from her!

For a little while Clara and I played "Sister Mary Mommy," which consists of her handing me one of her blankets and me putting it over my head like a nun's habit and then smiling and saying "Sister Mary Mommy!" Then we do it with her and I say "Sister Mary Clara!" Then repeat. She loves it. She laughs so hard. And since Jane was asleep I was able to spend the time with Clara uninterrupted, which is especially nice since I feel like I haven't gotten to interact with Clara as much the last few weeks.

Several people texted me birthday greetings during the day, but my favorite was Dad's:

Although I just realized he got my age wrong. Eh, close enough.

Once when I was a kid I went with Dad to pick out a Christmas tree, and the tree farm we went to had a short tree, only a few feet tall. It came exactly up to my nose and the top of Dad's back pocket, and he pointed that out. Then for the next few days (or weeks, I don't remember) he would ask me how tall the tree was compared to me and compared to him, so many times that I never forgot it, and now we can both sit back and marvel at how small I used to be compared to now. Anyway it was a sweet throwback.

During the morning Jack helped me clean up the apartment a bit, partly for my own sanity and partly because Erin and Rachel were coming over later. He even cleaned the bathroom, probably my least favorite chore, so that was very helpful.

At some point both Ellen and later Julie called to wish me Happy Birthday. Ellen and I talked a lot about Netflix shows, including Bloodline and The OA (which I had just finished the day before or so). Julie and I talked mostly about kids and raising toddlers. Either way I don't talk to either of them on the phone very often so that was nice.

I also opened all my birthday cards. Dad sent a funny one with a joke about "mom brain" and three dollar bills. Sarah sent a sweet one that said when she is with me and my family she feels like she's home. <3 And Merlene and Jack's grandma both sent checks, which frankly helped me feel better about not getting any work done that weekend.

In the early afternoon Jack stayed with the girls and I went out to get my free Starbucks drink. I go to Starbucks all the time throughout the year, but I still get excited about my free birthday drink each year. Just another gesture to make the day special. I splurged and got a venti mocha frap with whipped cream and everything, and while I ordered and waited for it I chatted with the barista about my birthday plans. It was one of the Starbucks I go to regularly and she recognized me. The last time I'd been there she had remembered I used to be pregnant (and wasn't any longer) and we had talked about our kids for awhile. I don't think either of us remember each other's names but it's still nice to have some familiar faces around where we live and feel at home.

I took my cool and delicious frap (perfect for this increasingly hot weather) and drove a little further down the street to Safeway, where I picked out some ice cream. It was on sale BOGO so it ended up being even less expensive than Walmart Neighborhood Market, a rarity. Then I took all my treats home just in time to get there before Erin and Rachel arrived.

They both came bearing gifts: Erin brought gluten free chocolate muffins (awww) and some apple cider and sangria. Rachel had brought us a stainless steel pots and pans set! I had actually specifically told Rachel not to worry about a gift because she's already driving all the way from and to the bay area to hang out, and I think that's gift enough. But she said she had some kind of discount and gift card or something so she just got it for us. That was touching.

Then they both helped me remove all our old dishes and cookware that have been glutened and replace with all the kitchen stuff I got for my birthday. Specifically Rachel helped by bringing in a bunch of tote bags from her car and sorting things into Goodwill vs trash and also dividing some of the nicer stuff among her and Erin to take home. And Erin helped by holding Jane the whole time. This always sounds like a simple task but it makes a huge difference.

We got through a lot of the kitchen before it was really getting to be time to head out. Erin and Rachel had split a Groupon so we could all go to Revolution Wines and enjoy some child-free visiting and wine sipping.

We arrived there in the middle of Happy Hour, which was perfect. We enjoyed an easy going atmosphere (people around but not overly crowded or noisy) and olives and ciabatta, fancy mac'n'cheese, a cheese plate, and several glasses of wine, all while talking for hours. We talked about our relationships and Erin's wedding and all sorts of odds and ends. It was a very good visit.

And Erin and Rachel still stuck around for a while when we got home and we enjoyed the gluten free muffins and ice cream together. We did stick a candle in a muffin and they sang me Happy Birthday, but that was really for Clara's benefit and for some reason she found it upsetting and had to be consoled. I think it makes her feel put on the spot. But the treats she had after helped her get over it quickly.

Ice cream and Cheerio face is over it.

Not long after the girls left, Neil called and we talked maybe half an hour about my day and his work and whatever. It doesn't really matter what we're talking about: Neil often makes me laugh pretty hard. I ended up getting off the phone with him when Renata called to say Happy Birthday, and she and I talked about 45 minutes about what's going on with us. I told her about how I had only two glasses of wine when I was out, and when we got back Erin asked if we wanted sangria or if we were all "drinked out." Renata and I laughed about how different that was then our celebrations in our early twenties, such as my 23rd birthday in Missouri, when we ended the night drunkenly at Waffle House wearing tiaras. How times have changed. Then we reminisced for awhile about that summer and how wonderful and formative it turned out to be. So glad we shared that together.

Renata and me during my 23rd birthday celebration, about 9 years ago now.

Not long after that I talked to Mom on the phone and told her all about my nice day. And when I was finally done with phone calls I got to listen to four voicemails of various Jacksons singing me "Happy Birthday"! (One VM from Don & Merlene, one from Dave & Meghan, and 2 from Aaron and Katie for some reason, the last of which was pretty funny because Aaron kept talking about how he hoped I listened to the VMs in order, otherwise I would just be too confused to understand.)

And throughout the day, of course, I also got birthday greetings on FB from people. These were my favorites:

The whole day was filled with good food and conversation and reminders of how many friends I have. It was very nice!