7.21.21 - Joy status: Finished genetics

I finally finished the genetics course that's been annoying me the last few months! I thought the final went well, we'll see. Then I had a wonderful time with Aaron at dinner. Awesome day.

6.30.18 - June joy statuses

6.7.18 - The Gluten Free aisle at Schnuck's

6.11.18 - Pool day & Polite Society

I woke up around 7 a.m. and went to Mom's. We used the Starbucks app to mobile order some iced grande mochas, then I walked in and grabbed them on our drive over to City Hall, and we walked all around the City Center and park talking. It was early enough that it wasn't too warm and we had a really nice time. I haven't been up there in years so it was nice to see again.

On the way back we stopped by Walmart Neighborhood Market and Mom picked up some groceries for herself and some gluten free food to keep around for Clara, which was very sweet. When we got back to her house I took off in a hurry so I could get back to the Jacksons and help get the girls ready for all of us to go to Mark & Linda's pool!

First of all the girls' suits were absolutely adorable and I really enjoyed that. And while I'm feeling a little worn out from all the supplies we have to pack (food, diapers, back up clothes, etc) every time we bring the girls anywhere, this outing was totally worth it. I also haven't been to Linda's in years, and I love spending time with her, and I haven't seen Mark in forever, so all of that I was looking forward to.

Clara's ballerina-like swimsuit

We got there and she waved us to park in her driveway. We went inside and there were not one but three cats (Santino, Mikey Fredo, and Purrrrl), and Clara was psyched  about that. She kept pointing them out and petting them, and Jane started crawling around chasing them, and for the most part the cats took it in stride.

Before we had even got outside the Wolks (minus Denny) and Ellen arrived, so we got everyone sunscreened up and ready to go. Incidentally the sunscreen Merlene bought us is excellent--it's not only gluten free but it's spray on yet still lotion (not aerolized spray) and seems pretty effective. Anyway as we were prepping all the kids Clara noticed the pool outside (which I also have never seen finished and which is gorgeous) and she kept saying "Swim?? Let's GO!" So excited haha.

Yet when we finally got outside she was of course a bit hesitant about getting in, which is fine with me as I want her to be cautious, although I'd also like her to see how fun swimming is. Zoey and Malcolm got in right away, and Jack waded in with Jane (who was perfectly content to be in the water), but Clara mostly stayed at the top step on the shallow end. I tried to entice her with various pool toys or by sitting next to her to get her to go in at least one or two steps more. At one point she stood near the edge of the pool and I got her to jump to me, but when I dipped her in to her waits (where her life jacket reached the water) she got scared and yelled "NOOOOO!" so I put her back on the top step. After that she didn't even want to go on the steps and spent a long time (over an hour at least) walking around the pool perimeter watching everyone, sometimes throwing balls back and forth, sometimes cheering for Linda and Ellen (and Jack) playing pool volleyball, but certainly never actually getting in the water.

Clara is cautious with the pool and perfers to walk around it.

Zoey is happy to get right in.

I was a little disappointed because I think if she tried it she would love it, but I tried to remind myself that she was having a great time anyway and there's no hurry. Zoey and Malcolm were loving it and Mark and Linda are great hosts and seemed happy to share and to tell us about how they put it together (along with other cool aspects of their lovely backyard, such as Mark's very organized garden which Julie really liked).

We had corn on the cob and strawberries and even some delicious vegan bread Ellen brought back from her friend's bridal shower weekend. Mark grilled hot dogs and had his homemade relish and dilled carrots (which Jane liked) and other treats. It was all so pleasant. Of course we had gluten free food for Clara (the muffins she loves, string cheese, oranges, PBJ) and she seemed happy with that.

At one point Clara was sitting on the edge of the pool with her feet on the top step, and I was spinning a yellow beach ball in the pool, which she found very exciting. Most of the rest of our crew were sitting at the patio table eating lunch, and on the radio Elton John's "Tiny Dancer" came on. I've always liked that song largely because of its inclusion in the soundtrack to "Almost Famous," which I enjoyed in high school. Something about being in Missouri in the summer, at a pool, listening to a nostalgic-sounding song that reminds me of high school--man, all of it was nostalgic in a very happy way, and I started singing along while swirling the beach ball and Clara seemed to enjoy it. It was really lovely.

Jane tries to inhale a corn on the cob.

Eventually Jane was rubbing her eyes so I went upstairs and nursed her in the guest bedroom and she completely passed out. Jack joined her and I went back down to the pool. Julie, Ellen, and I were goofing around while Linda took some pictures, and it was then--when no one was paying attention to her that she could tell--that Clara tentatively got back in the water. She layed down in the water on the first step and let her legs dangle over the other steps.

Getting braver.

I brought one of the pool boats over to her and she seemed interested but just before she was about to try to step into it Malcolm jumped in, so I launched him off and grabbed the other boat for Clara. I don't think it hurt that she saw Malcolm do it, and she was ready to get in. "Clara boat??" I picked her up and put her in and she loved it! I pulled her boat all around the pool for at least 45 minutes. She had her sunhat and eventually also Linda's sunglasses, and she was very happy to just keep floating. If I ever dragged her nearer the stairs again she would protest with "Oh! Oh! Clara boat!" meaning she wanted to keep floating. I was thrilled, actually, that she was in the water so much. I eventually dipped my hair in too, which incidentally is definitely in my joy inventory. Such a wonderful feeling.

She wanted to check out the fountains.

Eventually Jack came back down with a refreshed Jane and I had her on my hip in the pool. I took Clara out of the boat and held her on the other hip, and she was scared for a second but then seemed to really enjoy it.

By now we had been at Linda & Mark's for nearly 5 hours, so we decided to pack it in. Clara passed out on the way home but did wake up when we got back, which was fine because I figured it meant she wouldn't stay up too late with Don & Merlene watching her.

Jack and I took turns taking showers and watching the kids. Dave dropped by after work and visited briefly and saw the girls. Then Jack and I left the girls with Don & Merlene and we drove to Saint Louis to have dinner with Mike (his treat). On the drive there we were on the highway and I saw a woman next to us with her windows down singing along to whatever she was listening to. I couldn't hear her at all but it was a pleasant sight. At Jack's insistence (sweet of him) I slept on the way there, and I woke up when we parked in a beautiful area with tall old style houses that reminded me of San Francisco. They were across the street from a large beautiful park with wrought iron fences.

We walked down a super clean sidewalk and found the restaurant, and Mike was in the lobby waiting for us. He introduced us to the owner, Bryan, and we were sat immediately. Turns out Mike knows the owner from years before the restaurant even opened, and he spent weeks helping set up various IT and electrical framework, he continues to help maintain the restaurant, and in exchange he eats there for free probably about once a week. So that was amazing and made me feel more comfortable with him treating us to such a nice meal.

The food was good but the drinks in particular were great, and they all had funny pop culture names like Thai Fighter and I Am Groot. The restaurant has a steampunk theme which I really liked, including gears and pipes holding up lamps and bookshelves, etc. The whole thing is in a brick building which doesn't hurt. We had some fried portobello mushrooms for appetizers and dark chocolate pretzel bread pudding for dessert--those were probably my favorite parts. And we talked and laughed and had easy conversation the whole time. It was very enjoyable.

Then on the way home Jack was talking to me about things he'd been thinking about inspired largely by the sermon he heard at his parents' church on Sunday. And he told me that (paraphrasing) he finds me so attractive not just physically but as his wife and specifically because I've "kicked ass" keeping our family afloat the last couple years while he finished nursing school. It meant a lot to me to hear him say all of that. In fact I think it's one of the more profound and kind things he's said to me, so that was a nice way to top off the night.

5.26.18 - Sam Horne's with Beth

Beth and I haven't hung out in months (busy semester) but we finally scheduled time to go to lunch. I got up really early for a Saturday and was clocked in at Starbucks by 7:30 a.m. Beth and I were originally going to meet at noon but she asked to push it to 1 p.m. because of an appointment for their puppy, Max, and that schedule change worked out well for me because I got a more solid work session in. I enjoyed my freebie venti java chip frappuccino (nonfat milk, light whipped cream) and processed construction hours, tracked utilities for all of Dad's properties, and started putting together a PowerPoint animation training module I'm already pretty happy with. Then I went home to feed Jane before heading to Folsom.

I enjoyed the drive there with no kids in the car, just listening to my music and daydreaming. I missed the Sutter Street exit but that turned out to be kind of nice because I crossed American River and backtracked by turning around and crossing Rainbow Bridge. Rainbow Bridge is a landmark from my childhood in Folsom. Once I even had a vivid dream about crossing the bridge in a car with on driver. Anyway I haven't seen it much less been over it since we moved away in 1995 (when I was just a kid), so it was a pleasant and nostalgic surprise to be driving across it myself on the way back to Sutter Street.

I found parking without too much trouble because I have no problem walking a meager two blocks (and not even huge city blocks) to get to the restaurant. I walked down Sutter Street in perfect weather (the heat is coming but it's not here yet). Beth was already there. I had mac'n'cheese with bacon and we split some soft pretzels and had really good conversations about her family, Clara's developments, where we want to settle, etc. We visited for probably about an hour and a half and it was a really nice time.

A Yelp picture of the exact booth we were sitting in.

Then on the drive home I got to talk to Julie for about half the way and enjoy my music the rest. Nice quick Saturday outing.

1.31.18 - January joy statuses

12.27.17 - drinks with David and Sarah

David and Sarah and I met at Llewellyn's in old town St. Charles. We sat at a tall table for 6 near the door but since it was only a Wednesday we weren't taking up needed space. I got a rum and Diet that tasted like almost all rum; David said the same about his gin (don't remember what the drink was supposed to be), so next I ordered a very sweet Moscato and that was much better. All three of us split some soft pretzels, and David ended up paying for everything because, so he claimed, Sarah and I had come all the way to Missouri and it was the least he could do. Very kind.

We had a great time. We got there about 7 and stayed until nearly 11 just talking and laughing so much. I can't remember all of it now but I know we made jokes about exes and the Ghost of Christmas Present leading them to us at that table, laughing hard about old stories. I was definitely crying laughing at several points. At one point it was also a bit somber as I vented to them about Clara's speech issues, but they listened well and I appreciated that, and we still ended up laughign more before the night was over. It's so rare we are all in town together but it would be nice to make it a Christmas tradition.

7.23.17 - WallBQ

A couple weeks ago Doug changed his FB profile picture to him in front of a big wall, and he said something about how it would make a great wall ball wall. Then Dyl and Jack responded basically saying we should have a WallBQ (wall ball game followed by a barbecue) and bam, it was planned.

So today Jack and I packed up the girls and drove to Berkeley. Jane slept the entire drive, bless her. Clara didn't fall asleep until the very end, but she did a great job just hanging out in the back watching the world go by. I didn't even give her the Kindle for the first hour or so.

It was great to get out of the triple degree weather here and spend a day where the high was 74! Good wall ball and walking around weather.

Sadly, the old wall ball wall is closed. Both entrances to that level of the parking structure were gated and locked.

Long live the wall (pic from spring 2010)

However, everyone adjusted just fine and played against a wall in the parking garage itself. Sunday near campus there were no cars there except our own anyway, and this way everyone was already in the shade, a nice bonus.

Shaded, parking garage wall.

While the wall ball games got underway, Henry, Erin, and I took the girls for a walk in the double stroller. Jane fell asleep, and Clara enjoyed the front seat view of campus. I don't think I've been on Berkeley campus really since I graduated. It was a bit nostalgic.

We stopped in Memorial Glade and Clara explored everywhere, with the very helpful Henry chaperoning her. Meanwhile Erin held the umbrella we brought in place so that Jane could lie in the grass and still be in the shade.

Checking out those polka dots.

Jane chilled like that for the better part of an hour, and we all got a chance to talk a bit more. Clara kept calling Erin "Julie," I guess because they both wear glasses and Clara hasn't spent much time around Julie yet. It was cute. Once Jane started fussing we packed the girls back up and headed back.

Enjoying the grass.

We returned to the parking lot wall in time to watch the final wall ball game, in which Kale beat everyone, of course. It's been years since the last wall ball game and, frankly, most of us have gained weight and moved to a more sedentary lifestyle, but Kale still looks exactly the same.

This is what defeat looks like.

After the game was over we all visited in the parking lot for a while and Kale told us about how he proposed to Fitzy! It was a sweet story about using a board game they love, Twilight Struggle, to sneak a card to her that said "Will you marry me?" They are getting married next July and I fully expect an amazing first dance as they are both very good swing dancers.

Then we all migrated to Doug's for the barbecue potluck. Jack took a long way around so we could drive past some of the places we had most enjoyed when we lived in the East Bay, particularly Zachary's pizza. It was surprisingly nostalgic and I was also surprised at how many different places had memories for us, including some with Neil. Anyway, it was a nice little drive.

This place is in Jack's joy inventory.

Doug's house was charming as ever - more so, actually, because in the years since we've been there he has painted the rooms different cheerful colors and he has a massive bike rack on one wall for 4-5 of his bikes plus several friends' bikes.

When we first got there I was getting frustrated because despite feeding Jane and walking her around, she wouldn't stop fussing and I couldn't really visit with everyone and I felt as if she was probably irritating people. I tried to get her to sleep in one of the back bedrooms as she'd already been awake a couple hours, but she wasn't having it. For a bit, Dylan rocked her and she seemed to chill, but then she got pissy again. Finally I asked Jack to drive her around and try to get her to fall asleep, otherwise we'd need to leave because hanging out with a screaming baby isn't fun for anyone.

So Jack took her for a drive and Henry was very helpful in following Clara around (who wanted to hang out with someone's tiny dog outside), and I did get some time to visit with Kale and Senta and the Odoms. That was pretty nice. I also got a chance to eat some excellent salad and bbq sausage and other potluck delights. I wish I'd taken a picture of that excellent spread in Doug's cheerful sunny kitchen. More pictures! Oh well.

Jack stayed out for a long time, which was generous of him, and when he did get back it was about time to pack up and go anyway. Before we left, Henry, Kale, Doug, and I decided to plan a Tichu visit to our place in August. I hope that happens, I am already looking forward to it.

Jane is ready to leave!

Once we left, at first Jane was pissed off to be in her carseat again but she fell asleep as we hit the highway, and both she and Clara slept the entire way home. Side note: I also appreciate how Jack pretty much always drives unless he is truly exhausted. I dozed a bit myself.

Overall a great day. It's always nice to remember how many friends we do have in the (broad) northern California area.

11.13.16 - Moving talk with Andrew

Last week was the Trump v Clinton election, and since this is the Joy Inventory I won't go into a lot of detail about how Trump's victory affected a lot of people I care about. However, one small but important joy is my friend Andrew. He and I are pretty different politically, but we have been good friends for years now. We don't talk that often but when we do it's always as if it has been no time at all.

Early the morning after the election he messaged me to ask if I wanted to talk. We had an hour and a half phone call about how such a surprise result happened. Specifically he was interested in my POV, as a white conservative woman, about why so many people voted for Trump. We ended up swearing and laughing and commiserating, and it was really cathartic. And Andrew said he felt what I had to say helped him better understand and empathize with people who voted differently than he would have.

That meant a lot to me. First, it's always nice when people seek out your opinion, especially people you admire. Second, it's very encouraging when people show genuine, non-aggressive curiosity about perspectives other than their own. Third, it's a good feeling to be able to comfort or encourage a friend. And fourth, all of that meant a particular lot to me in the wake of a FB newsfeed filled with anger and miscommunication and unfair accusations. If everyone approached understanding one another the way Andrew just did, the world would be so much better for it.

So I felt like that conversation was a little example of hope right in the middle of a pretty difficult week, and I don't want to forget it.

6.17.16 - My birthday!

I "slept in" until 6:30am, then I started watching the first episodes of Season 6 of GoT while I pumped. Clara stayed asleep until it was nearly time to go, making it very easy for me to get everything ready. I also had time to ask people for suggestions on what to bake to get rid of the smoke smell in my apartment, and to ask people to tell me 3 things they're grateful for as a mini-FB gift to me on my birthday.

I dropped Clara off with Beth and then I went to Safeway to pick up some vanilla extract, because my favorite scent-related suggestion was baking a few capfuls of vanilla extract in a coffee mug in the oven for an hour. As soon as I walked into Safeway I could smell fried chicken. So, even though it was only 8:15am, I bought myself a fried chicken breast. I then went to Starbucks to get my free birthday frappuccino: a double double fudge frap. I do really love that Starbucks offers gold members a free drink every year on our birthdays. I look forward to it every time.

Chocolate whipped cream!

While I sat and waited for my drink I pulled up FB on my phone and read the responses so far to the 3-things-you're-grateful-for status. They make me so happy! It's soothing and pleasant to see how many things are going well in people's lives. I went home, set up the vanilla extract to bake, and enjoyed my extremely delicious and unhealthy breakfast while I listened to Spotify, cleaned up a bit, rearranged some music on my iPod, and uploaded the latest videos off my camera--all things I want to do but usually don't get around to.

I also opened a gift Dad had mailed me like two months ago that he said was for my birthday. It was the Firefly version of Clue! Looking forward to playing that soon. I've always liked Clue and I've long liked Firefly.

Then I drove to Davis and met up with Erin and Shannon for lunch. We went to Blaze Pizzeria, which is very similar to Pieology except it also includes calorie information, which is awesome. We sat outside in beautiful weather and talked about master's and PhD programs and apartments and travel and whatever else. Erin gave me my very Harry Potter themed birthday gift: a copy of Tales of Beetle the Bard and also a chocolate frog complete with the wizard card for Snape. It was awesome.

After lunch Shannon had to go back to lab, but Erin and I walked a few blocks to the movie theater and saw Captain America: Civil War. I won't pretend the plot made any sense but I still really enjoyed it partly because it was fun whispering comments to Erin and partly because there were several parts that made me laugh out loud (mostly Ant Man) and partly because I still love Iron Man.

This guy should beat Captain America every time.

I got caught in traffic driving back to pick up traffic, so I talked to Neil and that helped pass the time a lot. We pretty much discussed the best and worst parts of Civil War and why Iron Man is better than Captain America. After I picked up Clara, Erin met us at the apartment and she brought gourmet cupcakes!

LtoR: Maple bacon, red velvet,
mint chocolate, caramel chocolate,
brownie chocolate, white cream-filled chocolate.

Not too long after Rachel joined us, and she brought me a card with a very sweet note inside, plus some Ghiradelli chocolates and  a Starbucks gift card. So that was awesome. While we were all hanging out I got calls from (1) Don & Merlene, (2) Jack, (3) Dad and apparently everyone at The Robin Hood, and (4) Aaron and Katie, all singing me "Happy Birthday." 

Me with the maple bacon.

Erin, Rachel, (and Clara), and I hung out for several hours, eating cupcakes and drinking apple cider and talking about relationships and children and what it was like when we were kids. It was relaxing and enjoyable. Clara got very comfortable around them and was really cuddly, which they seemed to like too.

After they let I got Clara ready for bed and she went down peacefully, which was her birthday gift to me, I guess. Then I ran and checked the mail and found I had a lovely card from Julie with a Groupon for painting and wine for two from her and Everett, so that's something to look forward to too.

The card Julie made me.

And throughout all of this, the entire day, I got to keep checking my FB wall and my 3-things status to see everyones' well wishes, which I always enjoy. Overall it was a really fun day, and I still have my actual celebration to look forward to next weekend!