10.23.21 - Kid snippets: Calvin's plate is empty

Calvin thinks he should be able to leave the table as soon as his plate is empty, even if it's only empty because he took all the food off of it and put it on the table.

10.7.21 - Kid snippets: dancing to Can't Help Falling In Love

Tonight I tried to show the kids the second half of Labyrinth but for the most part they wouldn't stop doing other things, whining about stupid crap, and interrupting the movie. It was not what I'd hoped for.

But when it was over, Jane asked me if we could dance to lovely songs. So I put on the Elvis Presley version of "Can't Help Falling in Love" and the whole family danced to it three times. During one iteration, I held Calvin in my arms and danced with him while Jack did the same with Clara, and Jane twirled in her pretty dress between us all. It was pretty fantastic.

I think feeling that range of irritation to joy in the span of barely an hour is quintessential parenting.

10.4.21 - Kid snippets: What Calvin is thankful for

I asked the kids what they're thankful for.

Clara: I'm thankful for [lists every family member]
Jane: I'm thankful for every single day of the month, and I'm thankful for [also lists every family member].
Calvin: I tankful...boo, geen, yewwow, red, puhple

9.21.21 - Joy status: overcast and chilly, and Once Upon a Child

 It's overcast and chilly today.

This evening I went to Once upon a Child and got one new Halloween shirt for each kid. They were really excited when I showed them at home and wanted to try them on immediately. Calvin was so pumped when I put his on that he ran around the living room a couple times. Then we put on songs from Nightmare Before Christmas so they could dance.

In general I really love the last quarter of the year with all of the best holidays, and in particular I have enjoyed it more since having children and getting them excited with themed clothes and books and making decorations together and all of the anticipation of each event. It is so much fun!

9.12.21 - Kid snippets: Clara already knows everything

The first week of school was complete and Clara still had to go back the following Monday.

Clara: How long do I have to keep doing this?
Me: Oh a long long time. All of your childhood and most of the time you are a teenager too. Get used to it because it's going to be many years.
Clara: But why do I have to go to school so much?
Me: Well there are a whole lot of things you'll learn that will help you get ready to be a grown up.
Clara: I already know what I need to know! I know math and ABCs and can read!
Me: There is actually going to be even more than that.

In other news today Jane used my mom's set of play dishes and tiny little table and chairs to make a pretend dinner for Clara and me. She even used all of her strength to pull a full size chair over for me since I can't sit in the children's chairs. Then she let us know that her and my empty plates were filled with gluten food and Clara's had gluten-free food. Then she happily poured us what she told us was coffee and we all pretended to eat together and she was thrilled.

And finally, just in the last week Calvin has started actually giving me kisses upon request instead of gleefully shouting no and running away.

9.11.21 - Kid snippets: Ya wah-come

Calvin: Mah-eee, look!
Me: Oh you stacked the puzzle pieces in a tower. That's cool!
Calvin, very proud: Ya wah-come!

8.3.21 - Kid snippets: Mommy no do that!

Calvin is sitting in my lap coloring scrap paper at the table and repeatedly saying "Mommy no do that!" as I sit here doing literally nothing.

7.25.21 - Kid snippets: Where's my freaking pillow?

This afternoon when Jack picked us up from the airport, the girls and Calvin were delighted to see each other. Calvin just kept looking at them and giggling, which they returned in kind.

Also, tonight Jane realized her pillow wasn't at the head of her bed where it usually is.

Jane: What?? Mom! Where's my freaking pillow?
Me, already laughing: What did you say?
Jane, calmly: Where's my freaking pillow?

7.12.21 - Kid snippets: Calvinisms

These are some current Calvin translations:

"Up!" = Either "pick me up" or "put me down" depending on context
"How?" = Why?
"See me, Mama!" = Mom, watch what I'm going to do!

6.21.21 - Joy status: Calvin's bedtime routine

The main lullaby I sing the kids is "Baby Mine" from Dumbo, so sometimes Calvin asks me to sing "A E Mine." Recently he has started singing it along with me in that sweet toddler voice of his with a big grin on his face. Last time when the lullaby was done I said "good night, I love you" and he laughingly said "gah night!" as if it was some great inside joke of ours

6.15.21 - Kid snippets: Calvin doesn't come down the stairs

I'm trying to teach the kids that when I say "come here" they need to answer "Coming!" Calvin has picked up on it surprisingly fast.

Just now he was sitting at the top of the stairs to the second floor, and from the first floor Clara called and asked him to come see her. He immediately shouted "COMING! Cwawa! Coming Cwawa!" And then he just sat there.

Me: Buddy, you can't just answer "coming." You also have to actually go see her.
Calvin: Mama! I Cwawa coming!
Me: I know, bud! Now go down the stairs.
Clara: Callllvinnn! Come see meeeee!
Calvin, earnestly: Coming! I coming!! *proceeds to just sit at the top of the stairs*

This cycle repeated at least 10 times (with me laughing more each time) before he finally went downstairs.

5.14.21 - Kid snippets: Calvin laughing at things

I was playing a game with Calvin and asking him where all his different body parts were, but the only part he wanted to name was his butt. He laughed every time he said it.

On another note, every night at bedtime I tell him to lay down. He gets comfortable on his pillow and then giggles maniacally as I spread his blanket over him.

4.9.21 - Kid snippets: Calvin needs his eyes dried

When I wash the kids' hair, I tell them to look at the ceiling so the water runs down the back of their heads. Clara is good at it. Jane is mostly good at it but not always. If she looks down and gets water in her face, she asks for a towel. I hand her a towel and she dabs the water out of her eyes and she is fine.

Calvin has witnessed this so many times now, that whenever I pour water down the back of Jane's head, Calvin urgently requests that I dab his face with the towel. This seems to genuinely comfort him even though no water has touched his head.

3.27.21 - Kid snippets: kids pretending to be puppies

About once a day, Jane lies on the ground, covers herself with a blanket, and asks me to "open the present." When I remove the blanket, she pops up saying "woof woof woof!" I say "Are you a puppy??" and she nods vigorously and sticks her tongue in and out. She's been doing this for weeks, maybe months.

This morning Calvin came up to me covered in his blanket yelling "Mama!" When I took the blanket off, he uncertainly stuck his tongue out and grinned. I said "Oh! Are you a puppy?" and he yelled "Yeah!" Then he crawled around a bit and repeated the process. As a big bonus, my still-not-speaking little guy announced "I-uh pup-puh!" I'm pretty sure this is his first attempt at a sentence.

3.14.21 - Super efficient day

 The day was efficient both for getting work done and for spending quality time with the kids (two things I've recently been a bit anxious about).

This morning the girls woke up before Calvin. I heard some feet pitter patter into my room while Jack and I were still asleep. I didn't move or open my eyes and for a moment tried to see if I could tell which kid it was. Then I heard the empty Diet Coke can on my nightstand (from last night) lift up and get put back down, and I knew Clara had tried to see if there was any Diet Coke left to sip. I opened my eyes and was surprised to see both girls. Clara decided she wanted to go to the kitchen table and draw me a surprise, but Jane got in bed with us and lay there peacefully, awake but quiet, while I dozed with my arm around her. I think Jane in particular really benefits from cuddles. 

Eventually Calvin woke up and called to us from across the hallway. I picked him up and we all went into the living room. I had to avert my eyes so that I wouldn't see the surprise drawing Clara was still working on for me. I brought Calvin--all bundled up in his beloved blanket--to the couch, and he cuddled next to me on one side while Jane cuddled next to me on the other, and they both watched me do a jigsaw puzzle on my phone. Jane kept giving me helpful suggestions for the puzzle. Eventually Clara proudly presented her drawing for me - a pink butterfly with orange spots - and explained we have to save the drawing to put on the wall in May, not April. For some reason.

Then the girls went to play together in their room, and managed to do so peacefully for at least twenty minutes. And the entire time they did that, Calvin just leaned against me and watched me work on that puzzle. He was entirely content, not even wiggling around. It was great.

Later in the morning we got out the dress up clothes, and after both girls got decked out we played the freeze dance game for awhile, first on my phone with Spotify, and then through an official app with Alexa. Clara loved it. Alexa plays different styles of music and asks the kids to dance like robots, queens, turtles, and other figures before they have to freeze. Jane mostly watched Clara and smiled shyly, but when they said to dance like a queen she suddenly stood on tiptoes and jutted her chin in the air, held up part of her dress elegantly with one hand, and toddler strutted around the living room. It was awesome. Even Calvin put on a purple necklace and wiggled around with them a bit.

Later in the day I locked myself in my room and got a lot of SPL work done, which always puts me in a good mood.

Then in the afternoon, one of our new babysitters, Mariah, came over with her7-year-old daughter. Since Mariah hadn't been here in several weeks, and only once before, we decided Jack would leave to work on the job hunt and I would stay and let the kids get used to her. But only about half hour in they seemed very comfortable--and in Clara's case, really really happy--to hang out with Mariah and Abrielle, so I went in my room and left the door open while I did some more SPL work. That worked for about 30-45 minutes until Calvin remembered I was there and wanted to hang out. I reset him in the living room and shut my door, and he handled it fine. I got work done the whole time they were here, and meanwhile I could hear them having a wonderful time. They played with Alexa and then practiced expressing different emotions and other games, and by the time I emerged everyone except Calvin was sitting on the floor in a circle, feet touching, and bounching a ball to each other while they made animal sounds. Clara and especially Jane were laughing so hard. In fact when Jane saw me, she asked me to go away, lol. (Exact opposite of how she usually reacts.) The evening was a huge success.

And as I type this, I can hear Jane happily singing a song (that it sounds like she made up, which she does a lot lately) in the other room.

2.13.21 - Kid snippets: "I can ask how I want!"

Clara: Mom!
Me: Yeah?
C: You're not listening!
M: You haven't said anything.
C: Before - I *said* get me a belt.
M: Hey Clara?
C: Yes?
M: Of the two of us, which one is the mom?
C: (shyly) ...you
M: And which one is the daughter?
C: (giggling) me!
M: And are daughters supposed to tell moms what to do?
C: (back to shy) ((quietly)) ...no
M: No. You can say "Mom can you please get me a belt?" But you do not say "Mom you're not listening, I **said**..." Now do you want to try again?
C: (quietly) Can you please get me a belt?
M: (cheerfully) Sure!
C: (loud again) AND when *I* grow up I can ask how I want!

Jane finished her lunch so she got to have a gluten free (woohoo!) Oreo. Calvin was not done yet and I didn't want him to see hers so I told her to hide it. She smiled slyly at him, which he didn't notice at all, and held the Oreo behind her back. Then she turned around, hand behind her back fully visible, and slyly walked away. (Fortunately he still didn't notice.)

Clara and Jane are watching this video about different sized stars, and it has a moment where it explains that if the earth was as close to one of these other giant stars as it is to our sun, it would be inside the star and "we would all be very dead."

Clara: Mom, if the sun gets to us we will all fall down and die! So quick! We have to hurry hurry hurry!
Me, laughing: What are we hurrying to do?
Clara: We got to get off the earth and into space where it's safe.
Me: Good idea.
Clara: I will ask the alien to take us somewhere safe from the sun. But before the Earth dies, we must put on our astronaut clothes BEFORE the Earth dies. So. Can we do that tomorrow?

1.24.21 - Kid snippets: Calvin hates stray hair

Clara: I'm freezing cold.
Me: Go put some pants on.
Clara: Wait a minute! I'm warm!

Calvin really really hates it when a hair gets on him. Could be his fingers or toes or foot or anywhere. Sometimes it's his mouth because he picks food up off the floor. Either way he has a particular squeal that I already have come to recognize as "There is a hair on me! OMG get it off! OFF!" Given how much hair I have, that boy is in for a long road living with me for the next couple decades.

1.23.21 - Sweet evening with the kids while Jack is out of town

(Pre-evening kid snippets)

Jane asked to play "Text Me Merry Christmas." I did but I know Clara doesn't like it when we play holiday songs outside of their seasons. Sure enough Clara came up to me and very quietly asked if we could play a January song. I searched the word "January" on Spotify and found "January Wedding" by the Avett Brothers. It's a very laid-back, sweet sounding song. Clara started slowly dancing to it in the living room. When the singer actually sang the word "January," Clara turned to me with a huge open mouth grin.

Jane was sitting on the top bunk holding a long stick and pretending it's a gun. She kept saying "Pew pew!" as a sound effect but also as a verb, as in "I pewed the kitty!" when she pretended to shoot her stuffed cat. She narrated her pretend play to herself, and I was trying not to laugh so I wouldn't distract her. I heard "Yeah now he's dying! Because! I'm a super hero. To the rescue! ... Just kidding he's fine. Pew! I pew the wall!"

(And the evening)

Out of boredom, I rotated the coffee table 90 degrees parallel to the green chair, thinking the kids would get excited about the larger space. Actually it was the minimal space between the table and the chair that caught their attention. Clara wanted to treat the space like a tunnel for a toy train to go through, whereas Calvin just wanted to squeeze into the space and sit there (thus blocking Clara's tunnel). 

In an attempt to distract Calvin, I spread a full size blue blanket over the living room floor, put an empty egg carton on it, and started filling the carton with the Toy Story 4 figurines, saying it was a boat on the ocean. This distraction was way more interesting to Clara, who started playing with the "ocean." Jane joined her. They played happily while Calvin sat in his cozy spot and watched the, occasionally crawling through one of the spaces in the coffee table to stick his head out and shout at them. They all continued to stay busy without fighting while I made dinner.

While I cooked spaghetti, I blended the sauce with a can each of green beans and corn. It still looked reddish, and smooth enough that it wasn't too obvious. When the food was ready, I asked Clara to put three forks and three paper towels on the table. She got really excited about it! (We clearly don't eat meals together very often.) She asked me if she could also get us drinks (yes) and spoons and more forks (no). We moved Calvin's high chair to the table, and I brought their plates of spaghetti. 

I don't know if Clara was hungry because she ate little lunch or if she was just excited to participate in a discrete family meal or both, but she ate all her spaghetti quickly and easily. She asked me if there were meatballs in it. When I said no, she informed me that this is regular spaghetti and real spaghetti has meat balls. At one point I got up to get something for one of the others, and Clara told me that when I'm not eating I need to place my fork next to my plate neatly, not leave it on my plate. She also wanted me to politely wipe off my mouth with a paper towel at the same time as she did. 

Calvin and Jane also finished their dinner pretty easily, so I gave everone miniature Tootsie pops. Clara wanted me to watch as she and Jane "cheers" each other, i.e. gently knocked their Tootsie pops together and said cheers.

After everyone finished their Tootsie pops, we had a bath. Jane was very eager to help rinse soap off everyone else. Clara was happy to let her (Calvin was ambivalent). At one point Jane dumped a cup of water right over Calvin's head, and he didn't freak out. He just kind of squinted and waited for me to offer a towel. (Small example of how the younger children grow up learning to be more flexible.) They started splashing and getting really silly until they were laughing at everything each other was doing. I didn't really want them to soak the bathroom but I also don't like to disrupt them if they are all really enjoying each other's company. They splash each other and say a bunch of gibberish and laugh and laugh (just now as I type this Clara told me to say "blue be binky macka bah bah boo" for example).

As is often the case right now, Calvin was done first. I got him dressed and set him up with some ABC videos while the girls enjoyed really splashing now that the shower curtain was closed. Not long after Jane, then Clara, followed. As I started typing up this post, the three of them were peacefully watching ABC videos together, and for a moment I watched them and thought about how deeply happy I am that they are growing up together, and we're forming a tiny tight knit community.

1.22.21 - Kid snippets: Calvin moves the bacon

Last night I put a package of frozen bacon in a bowl of warm water in the sink to thaw. I checked some stuff online. I came back and the bacon is gone. In its place in the bowl of water is a can opener. I followed the path I saw Calvin take most recently and did not find the frozen bacon. Eventually I found it on the pantry shelf that is Calvin's height. Thanks buddy.

1.17.21 - Joy status: Making friends with sidewalk chalk

Yesterday we took the kids to the park. There were a lot of families there probably because the weather was nice. Clara was interested in playing with the other children, and so was Jane but Jane is very shy. Neither could quite figure out how to engage and instead they ended up playing in the sand of an empty volleyball area. Calvin wanted me to get out the sidewalk chalk that we finally remembered to bring.

Not long after I got out the chalk, various children, all of whom looked like they were age seven or younger, walked up to us and stopped 10 ft or so short and just stared at me. I started asking them if they wanted to use the chalk and they were all very excited to do so. Soon my own girls came back to do the same, and they all covered the picnic area sidewalks in their art. In the process Clara and Jane formed little temporary alliances and played delightedly and closely with the other kids for the remaining hour and a half that we were there. When we finally had to leave, we left all the small worn out or broken pieces of chalk for the other kids to keep playing with after we were gone.

It was pretty fantastic. I've already ordered a new set of sidewalk chalk to use as social glue next time we go.