7.31.19 - July joy statuses

7.29.19 - Kid snippets: sink corn

I drained some canned corn in the sink, took what I was going to eat, got derailed and left the rest sitting there. Jane, who historically picks corn out of her food, got excited about sink corn, brought her stool into the kitchen, and is eating the corn out of the colander by the spoonful.

7.27.19 - Kid snippets: Mr. Pterodatyl

Kid snippets: Clara, voicing the pterodactyl she's playing with: "Hello, I'm Mr. Pterodactyl! Welcome to our store house. It's a train! It's the Polar Express!"

Mr. Pterodactyl really has all the bases covered, I guess.

7.23.19 - Amazon baby shower

I made this FB status last week:

Several people commented or privately messaged me to say they'd love to come visit and hold Calvin. That was already encouraging. Others commented asking for details on how to send us diapers, and Ellen suggested we just make a small Amazon registry to make it easier for people. So a couple days later I did just that, and I just linked the registry ad a comment under the original status. I didn't really feel comfortable linking it as its own status because it seemed too demanding, but Ellen posted it herself with this comment:

I didn't expect her to do that and was touched by her help. That status was only two days ago, and the next day we got a whole bunch of diaper pail liners from Henry and new baby bottles, pacifiers, and a breast pump from Nick.

Nick had all his gifts wrapped, which was sweet.

Then today we were inundated with Amazon boxes. I came home from work to a huge stack of them piled against the desk. Clara and Jane kept trying to scale them to "get up high" so Jack thought we should probably open them and put them up.

For the next 20-30 minutes the girls rotated between helping Jack open boxes (90% of which were diapers and baby wipes) and showing off how they could pick up individual boxes of diapers by themselves and move them around (from chairs to the floor to chairs again to the bunk bed and back to the floor, etc.) They were just extremely busy moving boxes of diapers, and Clara kept declaring "Mom, look! I'm so strong!" They would stop occasionally to help Jack open even more diapers and baby wipes, and despite almost every package being the same product, they got excited every time, haha.

I expected a lot of gifts from Nick because he had commented on Ellen's status saying he would "take care of it" and immediately after nearly everything on our registry had been bought! His generosity is stunning. And sure enough, the bulk of the gifts were from him, all of them gift wrapped too (which made for more fun as the girls untied glittery bags containing--you guessed it--diapers and wipes).

But to make the event even more touching, we also got gifts from multiple people I hadn't realized or expected. For example Kelsey bought Calvin a very Calvin-looking onesie. Erin got us more diaper pail liners and diapers with funny notes attached, we got more diapers and wipes from Einar, Jen R., Neil, and Jack's Grandma and Aunts Cheri and Linda, and Angela sent us an Amazon gift card. As we opened gift after gift after gift not only was it an increasing relief in terms of supplies but it was also so touching in terms of feeling taken care of and supported by friends all over the country.

Anyway, after awhile Jane and Clara got busy building an apparent fort out of boxes of diapers in our bedroom while Jack stayed in the living room and finished breaking down boxes. Finally there was only one unopened box, and Clara helped Jack with it. It was more diapers, and to my delight Clara exclaimed "Again!! Holy moly!" Lol. I didn't even know she knew that phrase.

Jack raised the crib as high as it will go and managed to pack all the diapers and wipes underneath.

Between all the baby supplies we still have from Clara and Jane as littles plus all the supplies we've gotten for this unofficial baby shower, we are in great shape for Calvin's incoming. I'm so grateful for all our friends!

7.20.19 - Calvin flips

On Monday (7/15) I had a prenatal check up and my OB told me Calvin was breech. This news was actually pretty upsetting to me because if we can't get him to flip I'll have to get a c-section, which is more expensive than a typical birth and also has a longer more difficult recovery (meaning more difficult time getting back to earning money after his birth). I felt really stressed about money, resentful that we still have so many money stresses, unsure how I'll take care of three kids while recovering from surgery, and just worried in general.

Anyway, we went ahead and scheduled a version (procedure to try to get Calvin to flip around) for today, Saturday. I'm not allowed to eat anything 8 hours prior to the procedure or drink anything 2 hours prior, so on top of other stresses I was getting hungry, although it wasn't as bad as I thought it would be. Jack made the girls banana peanut butter pancakes, which they love, and that way I didn't have to mess with a bunch of food I couldn't eat. Afterward Clara played with legos that Jane wanted, so to keep them from bickering I started coloring and Jane joined me. I was pretty happy with the little picture we made together:

Beth kindly took the girls on a Saturday afternoon so Jack could go with me to the version. The whole idea is there are some minor risks that it could trigger labor or an emergency c-section, and I wanted him there in case. We also packed a hospital bag and talked to Beth about possibly having the girls spend the night if there was an emergency, which she was willing to do. She sure is wonderful.

Jane put on her own sunglasses on the way to Beth's.

I had to do the same procedure with Clara, who had also been breech, and I had been far more nervous that time than this time, mostly because people said it can be painful and I wasn't sure what to expect. This time I'd been through it before and, more importantly, I'd been through an emergency c-section before. Of the two, the latter is a lot more painful (recovery, anyway), so I felt calmer and more resolved about doing the version.

We got to the hospital and got all set up. Neil actually called me after our first nurse left and I chatted with him for probably 10-15 minutes before the next nurse arrived, which was kind of nice. We joked about random things. Always cheering talking to him.

The second nurse came (Candy) in and told me I'm having pretty steady albeit mild contractions, which really surprised me because I couldn't feel them at all. I only felt Calvin's continual movement. She said it was fine and not necessarily unusual especially for a woman who has had children already. Still kind of made me nervous though.

The doctor came in to do an ultrasound and confirm Calvin was still breech before we go through the actual version. I told her I was 90% sure he is breech because I can still feel bigger movements in the same upper spot of my abdomen from what I am guessing is his head. It's been consistently that way all week. Candy had mentioned that of the versions she's witnessed, she's seen only one where the baby flipped on her own without the procedure--so it's always possible but not super common. And that's as Jack and I expected.

But when the doctor got the ultrasound set up, she put the wand low on my abdomen and there was Calvin's head! She said "Well there he is" and Jack asked "Wait is that his head??" and she said yes and Jack, me, and Candy all immediately cheered, haha. It was a delightful moment and a big relief. No pain, pressure, or risks, because he was already as he should be.

The doctor congratulated us and Candy went and got our discharge papers. Jack and I decided to celebrate by me taking the day of calorie counting, so after we left we first went to McDonald's so I could get a filet-o-fish meal, and then we still went to MOD and got lunch there together, haha. While we were ordering at MOD another customer asked how far along I was. I said I was due in about 2.5 weeks and the customer as well as the MOD staff congratulated me, asked if it was a boy, and talked to Jack about how they bet he's happy to be having a boy. It was sweet.

And to top it off, after we ate a bunch of junk food, Jack dropped me off at home so I could take ~1hr nap while he went to pick up the girls from Beth. I was surprisingly exhausted, despite getting decent sleep the night before. Maybe it was the stress. But I slept hard.

After the girls got home I hung out in our very comfy rocking chair in the nursery with Jack while he set up the new under-the-bed storage we're going to use for Jane's clothes. Jane joined us, playing with the fake food, and we could hear and kind of see Clara in the bathroom playing with her dinosaurs in the sink. Everyone was relatively peaceful. I actually fell asleep again in the rocking chair half-listening to their goings abouts and it was pretty nice. Jack kept them busy so as not to wake me. I don't think I slept very long that time but it was pleasant.

Overall it was a wonderful surprise turned into a celebratory day.

7.14.19 - Kid snippets: Jane's incoherent babble

Jane: [incoherent babble]
Me: What babe?
Jane: [exact same incoherent babble]
Me: I don't understand you, hon.
Jane: *tilts her head down, raises both her eyebrows* Mommy! *gives me a pointed look* [exact same incoherent babble]

7.13.19 - Renata's day visit

Even though Renata lives much closer now (San Francisco), our schedules are such that we rarely see each other, so a few weeks ago we picked a date to stick to, and that was today.

I got some work done in the morning and then Jack helped me clean the apartment relatively thoroughly. Amazing how much we can get done when (1) Jane is asleep and Clara is watching a video and (2) we are kind of hurrying because we have company coming over. This might be the cleanest my desk has been since I assembled it.

Jack left to study for the NCLEX and Jane woke up shortly before Renata arrived. Renata came bearing gifts: gluten free pizza, rotisserie chicken, mashed potatoes, watermelons and cantaloupes, and toys. She brought this adorable mermaid-themed tea set and a Melissa & Doug set of fake food. She also brought some very cute baby boy clothes for Calvin.

At first Jane was being very shy and just laying against me on the couch not looking at Renata, but Clara was excited to see her and very excited about the toys. They started playing with the tea set right away (which Clara informed us was actually hot chocolate) while Renata and I visited. Of course eventually Jane warmed up and started also pouring hot chocolate and putting pieces of food on plates to hand to Renata and me. Clara also handed food to her stuffed elephant, Fawn, and stuffed puppy, Jelly.

It was wonderful having Renata here. I'm in the last month of pregnancy and I am very easily tired and irritable. I'm struggling to be home with the girls by myself because it inherently requires getting up and down so much. Renata took care of a million little things so I could stay seated on the couch (getting Jane her cup, getting the girls food, helping the girls wipe off their faces, etc etc) and it really does make a huge difference. Besides that, she kept me very awake and alert because we were animatedly visiting the whole time. She briefly had to leave in the middle to pick up Mia from the groomer's, and while she was gone I was struggling to stay awake while the girls watched a movie. As soon as she returned it was easy.

And it was great catching up with her! I've been thinking recently about Renata, actually, and how she is one of my female friends who I resonate with specifically in terms of how direct she is and how readily she advocates for herself. These are qualities I've always liked about her and have come to appreciate more as time goes on.

The girls were fairly excited to see Mia, who is a smaller dog and very even-tempered and relaxed. Clara very carefully would pet Mia and Renata let Clara give some dog treats. Jane mostly observed. At one point Mia barked a few times--not that aggressively in my opinion, but it frightened Jane. But I held her for a bit and she recovered quickly. We took the girls and Mia around the complex for a walk. I loved the summery outfits they ended up wearing--Jane so cool in her sunglasses (which she specifically requested), and Clara looking a little "punk rock" (so I told her) in a frilly tulle pink skirt with bright green and red ninja turtle boots. It had been a hot day and even then at past 6 pm it was pretty warm, but at least a lot of the complex was in shade and it was a tolerable warm. Mia can be off leash and totally fine, even when other dogs are around. It was pretty impressive.

We went back to the apartment and had some of the tangerine popsicles Renata had brought for us. We ate them on the front porch/balcony so the inevitable drips wouldn't get all over the apartment complex. Amazingly we couldn't get Jane to try one, but she happily brought the tea set out to us--one piece at a time--while we ate. Clara enjoyed her popsicle very much until it started melting on her hand, so Renata showed her how to wrap a paper towel around the stick to hold it. Ultimately Renata ended up holding it for Clara while she ate, and then we put the rest in a bowl and let her eat it with a spoon.

She stayed and visited with me until it was time to put the girls to bed, and even then she helped clean up the apartment while I got them ready. When she and Mia left the girls ran to the nursery and watched them out the window as they went to their car, waving and saying bye. Renata turned what would have been a long, tiring, slightly boring, difficult day into a really fun summer-themed visit, and I am so glad she came up!

7.13.19 - Kid snippets: Diet Coke retriever

Clara knows how to open the fridge (requires both her hands on the door, feet apart, and all her strength), open a bottom drawer, and bring Jack a nice cold Diet Coke. I think that's adorable and hilarious.

7.7.19 - Sisterhood

Last night when it was time to read stories, instead of sitting on the in my lap or on the floor next to me, Jane very slowly and carefully climbed the ladder to Clara's top bunk. To my knowledge she's never done this before. Clara was very excited about it and soon joined her. I stood up and read them the rest of Very Hungry Caterpillar, which they half listened to while they also explored the very many books and toys that have accumulated on Clara's bed.

When I finished the book I just leaned against the bunk bed and watched them play together. They were doing so well I didn't really want to have them go to bed just yet. They pointed out objects in books and counted together (mostly Clara). At one point Clara pretended to have some pizza (what we'd had for dinner) and offered some to Jane, and Jane pretended to take it out of Clara's hand and eat it. Clara said "Isn't it so yummy?" and Jane very enthusiastically responded "YES!" It's delightful to see them both playing together, especially pretend play that they both seem to understand. I even thought about letting them both just stay up there as I think Clara would actually love to have a "sleepover" with Jane, but I doubt Jane can handle climbing down the ladder yet and decided not to risk it. Either way, though, it was so sweet watching them so excited to be on the top bunk sharing things together.

Then today Jane was watching a Youtube video of the ASL alphabet and she kept wanting me to start it over for her. I showed her that if she presses "0" she can start it over herself, but of course she didn't immediately understand. Clara saw me trying to explain it and took over the tutor role. She would grab Jane's hand and put Jane's finger on zero. A few times Jane tried it and accidentally hit 9, which starts the Youtube video 90% through, so Clara would exclaim "Nooo! Zero, hit zero Jane!" and help Jane again. It didn't take Jane long at all to understand and then each time she successfully restarted the video Clara would congratulate her. "Good job, Jane!" Very sweet older sister functioning.

7.4.19 - Sacramento 4th of July

Today was excellent.

Day started off rough as I was bummed that we had no specific plans. We spend too many days when the girls are home just hanging around the apartment and I think Clara is more than old enough now to get excited about holidays. There were no kids events at the local park that often has holiday stuff (e.g. they had an Easter egg hunt in April). We weren't sure if fireworks would work out as they don't start until 9:30pm and the girls are usually asleep by 8:30 at the latest. We had invited some friends to visit but it fell through. Etc.

But then I decided if nothing else we could at least do our own family picnic. Both Jack and I were off work, which is rare. So I ran to Safeway and got gluten free Kettle chips, hot dogs, and nectarines. We already had gluten free strawberry ice cream at home. We got the girls dressed (in red and blue, of course) and went to the rose garden in McKinley park.

Jane kept asking me to fix her sunglasses and then immediately pulling them back down.

We got there before 11am, meaning it was not even hot out yet, actually quite nice. We sat in the shade of one of the giant palm trees and enjoyed the food. I even bought $1 plates and napkins with American flags on them.

When the girls were done eating, they started running around the garden chasing each other or Jack or having him chase them. There was almost no one else there except, we later learned, the all-volunteer gardeners who keep the roses blooming. So there was plenty of space for the girls to run around, and Jack was good sport keeping up with them. In my 8th month of pregnancy, I'm not doing a lot of running. I was happy to just watch over our picnic supplies.

L: watching trash truck; R: back to eating ice cream cone with a spoon

We took the girls home and Jane went down for a nap pretty easily. I took the opportunity to nap too while Jack half dozed on the couch and Clara watched DinoTrucks (or something) on Netflix. Once I woke up (not long after Jane), Jack took a turn taking a real nap and I hung out with the girls while we watched Super Simple Songs and ate more of the picnic food. We also danced a bit, per Jane's request, which was pretty sweet. Actually I kind of stood in one spot snapping my fingers and the girls ran excitedly in circles around me. But that works.

After Jack woke up he went out and bought gluten free popcorn and seasoning, came home and made a huge paper shopping bag full of popcorn. Meanwhile we watched the Incredibles in the background, which is such a great movie. Jack and I were enjoying it probably at least as much as the girls.

Then we headed out again, this time to CalExpo because apparently admission is free to see their fireworks. We parked a bit away, next to a Hobby Lobby, and put the girls in the stroller to walk over to the Expo. We actually got surprisingly good spots: the fireworks are shot from a race track and while the stands were pretty fully, the actual dirt race track had more room, presumably because most people don't want to sit in the dirt. But we'd brought a blanket so it was fine. We spread out, ate our popcorn, listened to live music, and waited for the show to start.

This wait was one of the best parts of the day as Jane and Clara were so excited. I don't think they were even totally sure what they were excited about, especially not Jane, but there were so many people around and the music was so lively and everyone seemed in a good mood, so they were just dancing and stomping and, best of all, every now and then Clara would stop, pump both her fists in the air, and yell "YEEESSSS!" I started letting her know when there was less than 15 minutes until fireworks and updated her every few minutes, and her excitement only mounted.

I was pretty tired and it's increasingly difficult staying comfortable as the pregnancy winds down, but Jack sat behind me and let me lean against him and that was nice too. I also enjoyed seeing all the festive outfits of the people around us, especially the kids too little to even know what's happening, along for the ride.

By the time the fireworks actually started, Jane was pretty tired, and she laid peacefully against me in my lap for the entire fireworks show. Clara was dazzled by the fireworks, and kept pointing them out to Jack as if he might not otherwise notice.

After awhile she seemed to notice the considerable number of people taking pics and videos of the fireworks with their phones, and she asked if she could hold my phone too. I opened the camera and even though she doesn't really know how to take pictures on it, she held it up and viewed the fireworks both live and in the camera and seemed very happy about it.

Watching her and Jane, but especially Clara, get so into it was actually quite moving. She was so happy I almost felt like tearing up. In any case it was great to share the show with my family. When it was done and everyone cheered and applauded, both girls also clapped enthusiastically.

We walked out of CalExpo with the mass exodus of spectators. Jane seemed repeatedly concerned about where I was if she couldn't see me from the stroller, so after a while I just held her hand as I walked alongside them and she was fine. She and Clara pointed out dogs and tiny personal fireworks along the route, and actually just as we got to a fire station it opened up and a fire truck exited, so they got front row seats to that show, which was kind of cool. They ate more popcorn in the car as we listened to "Gloria" and waited to get out of a packed parking log, and of course they both passed out during the relatively short ride home, and stayed passed out when we put them straight to bed.